It never ceases to amaze me how fast the time goes. It's been a year and a half since we first started talking with Johnny and Seth. In that time we've had three visits, on both sides of the country, 2 IVF transfers, one miscarriage, and the birth of one incredible boy. Yet it seems like we just started contemplating our whole journey!
I had my court appointment yesterday to terminate my parental rights to Levi. In the state where we live, this is the final step of the surrogacy process. So, Journey #2 is officially over. I've said it before... At the beginning of the whole process, I feel like the birth of a child is that almost unattainable goal at the end of a long tunnel with no end in sight. The first stages are full of appointments, and medications, and anxiety, and hope. Then the pregnancy itself is 9 whole months! That should take for.ev.er to pass, right? Well, it really doesn't..... I can't believe it is December, and that Levi is here, that I'm not pregnant any more. It goes SO fast looking back on everything. Which is why I try my hardest to pay attention to, and cherish, every moment.
I've been blessed with two incredible families to carry for. I say that my second journey is "over", but I know that that really isn't the case. The legal processes are done, and Levi is here and settled with his family, but this is not "the end" for us. Chris, our kids, and I have been accepted into the hearts and lives of two amazing families. Our family has expanded to include everyone as well. At the risk of sounding really mushy and cliche, surrogacy has brought us so much more than two beautiful children.
I feel peaceful after this second journey. It took me a few days to put my finger on the right word for my feelings, but I settled on peaceful. It's been almost two weeks since Levi was born. He came early on a Monday morning, and left for home with his family Thursday afternoon. In the three days after his delivery, I was able to spend as much time as I wanted with Levi- and S&J. They allowed me the things that are important to me after delivery- time being the biggest one. I was able to feed Levi, change him, snuggle him, and show him off to my friends and family. The last night we were in the hospital, Seth and Johnny got one last night of baby-free sleep at their hotel, gifting me with uninterrupted time with Levi. Between Wednesday afternoon and Thursday afternoon I think we packed in a week's worth of visits- pictures, food, messages, and being together, our family and theirs. And then it was time for them to take Levi home.
The goodbyes are always hard. Our family "grew" this beautiful baby for 39.3 weeks. I carried him with love, the same way that I carried my own babies. I was more prepared for the emotions this time- the love that I felt for this child that wasn't mine, the inevitable separation when it was time for me to step back from being the care giver and turning that role over to his parents, the bittersweet of our last "see you soon, and this is NOT goodbye" at the hotel on Thursday morning.... Our experience with Jason and Mia prepared me for all that. But it still sucked (lol). Suddenly, Chris and I wished we lived a whole lot closer to the East coast- or that everyone would move out our way!
I say I'm peaceful because settling back into our "normal" routines at home was easier this time. I think it's because we have done this before. After Mia went home, I struggled a little bit with not having a baby to care for. Chris and I were used to bringing home that new little bundle from the hospital and having our world turned upside down for awhile. And here I was, newly delivered, with no baby at home. For about a week, I felt as though something was missing. After Seth and Johnny took Levi home, I expected to feel the same way; I watched for it, prepared to tell everyone I was doing okay- but maybe lying just a little. But that missing feeling never came, and it still hasn't. I am perfectly content with my little family here, getting back to "normal", and enjoying my time off from work. I talk to S&J at least once a day right now, and love getting their updates- or just chatting like we did before Levi was here.
It helps knowing that these people are a part of our lives now. I won't ever have to wonder how Mia and Levi are doing, how they are growing, if they are loved. Even if our contact tapers off, I know that we'll still be included in milestone moments and life's big events. Chris, and the kids, and I may be that branch of crazy family that lives really far away, but we will still be family. Who knew when we started down the surrogacy path all those years ago that our lives would be enriched in so many ways? These experiences have turned into so much more than I ever expected them to be, and I am grateful for every moment- all the ups and the downs.
So, it's come to that time again. Time to say goodbye to another surrogacy journey, time to say goodbye to my surro blog. Already, my friends are asking me "Do you think you'll do this again???". And my answer is "Well, it's just too soon to tell". I already miss being pregnant- there is something truly magical about growing another life inside you, and feeling that little person start to move and grow. Bringing new life into the world is one of the most amazing, special feelings... And even after a difficult delivery, I can look back and say I would do it all over again. So who knows? Maybe in a couple years, I can revisit this blog and share another journey with you. We'll just have to wait and see.
Lilypie First Birthday tickers
pregnancy ticker
Saturday, December 14, 2013
Saturday, December 7, 2013
He's Here!!!!
Wow. I can't believe it's over..... Again.
The last post left us at 39 weeks, and waiting for this little man to arrive in the world. Seth, Johnny, Joan, and Mike were all here; we celebrated Thanksgiving together, and everyone was settling in to wait. Friday came and went, Saturday came and went.... I was having contractions every now and then, but nothing that resembled labor. We were all beginning to think I was going to make my next doctor's appointment that following Tuesday!
Sunday morning, I was up early with contractions again. But just like the previous two or three nights, the contractions completely stopped after about three hours. We made plans to meet everyone for lunch, then go wander around the Festival of the Trees- a yearly holiday activity one of the hospitals puts on. It was gray and gloomy outside, and I don't think anyone was really up for going out, but we all went anyway. Afterward, S&J came back to our house with us. We were going to just veg on the couch, watch movies, and eat popcorn and chocolate covered goodies.
We hadn't been home for very long when I finally decided we should probably head to the hospital and get checked out. I'll spare you the details, but I had been having some leaking throughout the day. After consulting with a couple of my nurse friends (at almost the end of the day, of course) I told Chris we should probably go in. I didn't think what I was leaking was amniotic fluid, so I didn't want to get S&J all excited by announcing that I thought my water had broken. Instead I had to use the really vague "there's something going on, but I'm not really sure what......".
So, we had a friend come watch the kids while S&J and Chris and I headed down to the hospital. In triage, I told my nurse (also one of the friends I'd "consulted") that I still didn't think it was amniotic fluid.... And after seeing it, she wasn't sure that it was either. But guess what??? It was. lol... How long have I been doing this? 12+ years??? Just goes to show that it's not always easy to tell what is going on. Turns out, I had what we call a "high leak"; I was leaking just little amounts of fluid at a time- not enough to soak anything, or even make me feel wet. The "weirdness" I was seeing all day was these tiny amounts of fluid- but there was meconium in the fluid, which made it look green.
It was Baby Day!!!! Or Baby Night, as it was about 8pm by then.... Since I wasn't sure exactly how long I'd been ruptured, it was decided to start some pitocin. I had been leaking all day with no spontaneous contractions, so I didn't think waiting any longer would change anything. I had a great friend as my labor nurse, and it wasn't too long before we were all settled in our room. Labor room 2408, where Aiden, Paige, and Finn had all made their entrance into the world. Mia came on a day where all our rooms were full, so I didn't get to pick my room that day.... Chris went home to collect Aiden and Paige, who both desperately wanted to be there for delivery.
I was about 5cm dilated when I was admitted. My nurse and I expected my labor to progress fairly quickly after starting the pitocin. That was, after all, my history. I figured we would start the pitocin, get into a good labor pattern, get an epidural, and deliver a couple hours later. We started the pit around 10, and I was ready to get an epidural by midnight. My contractions weren't very strong, and I wasn't leaking much fluid so I was a little worried this might not be as quick as we originally thought. After the epidural, the "high leak" popped, and my water broke completely. So much for worrying about not leaking much.... there ended up being a TON of fluid in there. My nurse and I joked that the baby was probably only 5 or 6 pounds because all the fluid had to have taken up the rest of the space! But, I was still only 5cm dilated. At 2am, I was 7cm. My nurse and I started to wonder what was going on. This was not going as expected. So everyone settled in and tried to doze or sleep a little- the kids were sleeping and doing great.
At 4am, I was still 7cm. The baby was lower, and my cervix was thinned out, but I was still only 7. So, I really started turning side to side with some sitting straight up in between. My contraction pattern was good, the baby was looking great, but this delivery just wasn't happening. The next little bit of time runs together for me. The moving around was working, and I was getting more uncomfortable. I know at one point I was 8cm, then 9cm- both numbers I hadn't seen before. "Usually" I would power through from 7 to 10 with no inbetween. Finally, finally, my nurse said she was going to call the doctor in and I could push soon. I could feel the baby's head moving down, and it was getting worse with every contraction. I was shaking, and uncomfortable, and teary. This was definitely NOT the graceful delivery I had anticipated.
I looked up my delivery record afterward. They called me 10cm at 528 in the morning. Seth and Johnny, Aiden and Paige were up and ready. Chris was on one side of me and my nurse on the other. First contraction I was able to push the kiddo down to almost crowning, but it was hard!!! The second contraction was harder, but they all said his head was out. I sure couldn't tell- there was no sense of relief like I had felt before. By now, I think I was hyperventilating and I know I was crying. I couldn't breathe, and it all hurt, and the baby wasn't coming out! Turns out, he really was stuck. I was in the midst of what we call a shoulder dystocia. The kiddo's head delivered, but his shoulders were wide enough that they wouldn't fit under my pubic bone- at least not without a lot of help. Lucky for baby, and for me, the doctor who was on call that night is very good with that kind of thing. After a lot of work, and a huge amount of group effort, Baby Levi finally made his way into the world. He was quickly handed off to the NICU team who were there and waiting- both for the meconium, and now the shoulder dystocia. Before too long, I heard his sweet cry, and they told me he was okay. The doctor looked at me and said "I'm serious when I say this.... I think that baby is over 10 pounds!". I think I cried a little harder.
Baby Levi
December 2, 2013, 534am
9 pounds, 10 ounces 21.5 inches long
My longest pregnancy, at 39.3 days. My biggest baby. One of my longest labors. Mr. Levi broke some pretty impressive records. My nurse and I looked at each other and said, "that's why this labor took so long!!!'.....
But I would do every second of it over again to bring this miracle into the world.
The last post left us at 39 weeks, and waiting for this little man to arrive in the world. Seth, Johnny, Joan, and Mike were all here; we celebrated Thanksgiving together, and everyone was settling in to wait. Friday came and went, Saturday came and went.... I was having contractions every now and then, but nothing that resembled labor. We were all beginning to think I was going to make my next doctor's appointment that following Tuesday!
Sunday morning, I was up early with contractions again. But just like the previous two or three nights, the contractions completely stopped after about three hours. We made plans to meet everyone for lunch, then go wander around the Festival of the Trees- a yearly holiday activity one of the hospitals puts on. It was gray and gloomy outside, and I don't think anyone was really up for going out, but we all went anyway. Afterward, S&J came back to our house with us. We were going to just veg on the couch, watch movies, and eat popcorn and chocolate covered goodies.
We hadn't been home for very long when I finally decided we should probably head to the hospital and get checked out. I'll spare you the details, but I had been having some leaking throughout the day. After consulting with a couple of my nurse friends (at almost the end of the day, of course) I told Chris we should probably go in. I didn't think what I was leaking was amniotic fluid, so I didn't want to get S&J all excited by announcing that I thought my water had broken. Instead I had to use the really vague "there's something going on, but I'm not really sure what......".
So, we had a friend come watch the kids while S&J and Chris and I headed down to the hospital. In triage, I told my nurse (also one of the friends I'd "consulted") that I still didn't think it was amniotic fluid.... And after seeing it, she wasn't sure that it was either. But guess what??? It was. lol... How long have I been doing this? 12+ years??? Just goes to show that it's not always easy to tell what is going on. Turns out, I had what we call a "high leak"; I was leaking just little amounts of fluid at a time- not enough to soak anything, or even make me feel wet. The "weirdness" I was seeing all day was these tiny amounts of fluid- but there was meconium in the fluid, which made it look green.
It was Baby Day!!!! Or Baby Night, as it was about 8pm by then.... Since I wasn't sure exactly how long I'd been ruptured, it was decided to start some pitocin. I had been leaking all day with no spontaneous contractions, so I didn't think waiting any longer would change anything. I had a great friend as my labor nurse, and it wasn't too long before we were all settled in our room. Labor room 2408, where Aiden, Paige, and Finn had all made their entrance into the world. Mia came on a day where all our rooms were full, so I didn't get to pick my room that day.... Chris went home to collect Aiden and Paige, who both desperately wanted to be there for delivery.
I was about 5cm dilated when I was admitted. My nurse and I expected my labor to progress fairly quickly after starting the pitocin. That was, after all, my history. I figured we would start the pitocin, get into a good labor pattern, get an epidural, and deliver a couple hours later. We started the pit around 10, and I was ready to get an epidural by midnight. My contractions weren't very strong, and I wasn't leaking much fluid so I was a little worried this might not be as quick as we originally thought. After the epidural, the "high leak" popped, and my water broke completely. So much for worrying about not leaking much.... there ended up being a TON of fluid in there. My nurse and I joked that the baby was probably only 5 or 6 pounds because all the fluid had to have taken up the rest of the space! But, I was still only 5cm dilated. At 2am, I was 7cm. My nurse and I started to wonder what was going on. This was not going as expected. So everyone settled in and tried to doze or sleep a little- the kids were sleeping and doing great.
At 4am, I was still 7cm. The baby was lower, and my cervix was thinned out, but I was still only 7. So, I really started turning side to side with some sitting straight up in between. My contraction pattern was good, the baby was looking great, but this delivery just wasn't happening. The next little bit of time runs together for me. The moving around was working, and I was getting more uncomfortable. I know at one point I was 8cm, then 9cm- both numbers I hadn't seen before. "Usually" I would power through from 7 to 10 with no inbetween. Finally, finally, my nurse said she was going to call the doctor in and I could push soon. I could feel the baby's head moving down, and it was getting worse with every contraction. I was shaking, and uncomfortable, and teary. This was definitely NOT the graceful delivery I had anticipated.
I looked up my delivery record afterward. They called me 10cm at 528 in the morning. Seth and Johnny, Aiden and Paige were up and ready. Chris was on one side of me and my nurse on the other. First contraction I was able to push the kiddo down to almost crowning, but it was hard!!! The second contraction was harder, but they all said his head was out. I sure couldn't tell- there was no sense of relief like I had felt before. By now, I think I was hyperventilating and I know I was crying. I couldn't breathe, and it all hurt, and the baby wasn't coming out! Turns out, he really was stuck. I was in the midst of what we call a shoulder dystocia. The kiddo's head delivered, but his shoulders were wide enough that they wouldn't fit under my pubic bone- at least not without a lot of help. Lucky for baby, and for me, the doctor who was on call that night is very good with that kind of thing. After a lot of work, and a huge amount of group effort, Baby Levi finally made his way into the world. He was quickly handed off to the NICU team who were there and waiting- both for the meconium, and now the shoulder dystocia. Before too long, I heard his sweet cry, and they told me he was okay. The doctor looked at me and said "I'm serious when I say this.... I think that baby is over 10 pounds!". I think I cried a little harder.
December 2, 2013, 534am
9 pounds, 10 ounces 21.5 inches long
My longest pregnancy, at 39.3 days. My biggest baby. One of my longest labors. Mr. Levi broke some pretty impressive records. My nurse and I looked at each other and said, "that's why this labor took so long!!!'.....
But I would do every second of it over again to bring this miracle into the world.
Saturday, November 30, 2013
39 weeks and waiting.....
Well, any day now......
The big question at the end of a surro pregnancy (other than when will the baby get here) is when should the parents come to town?
Our plan was for S&J to head to town last Monday, November 25th. But then some things came up, and it turned out that they weren't going to have the time they were expecting to just hang out and wait for baby like we all thought they would. This turn of events caused us to start playing the "when is the best time to come out" game.... Unfortunately, there is just no way to tell. A lot of surros will schedule an elective induction to give their IPs an end date to the pregnancy. Even though babies don't always follow best laid plans (Miss Mia.....), it at least gives a jumping off point for planning travel. We decided not to do that this time; S&J want Baby Boy to come when he is ready, and not when we are ready for him. Also, my doc went out of town for the Thanksgiving holiday- so scheduling an induction with an absent doc is a little tricky. Every week at my appointments we tried to gauge if anything was happening in there. And every week, it was a resounding NO! Little Mister seems perfectly content to hang out and be all cozy in my uterus. And apparently, my uterus likes him there and is not interested in kicking him out.
So, travel plans were changed. I delivered two of our babies at 39.1 weeks; the longest I was ever pregnant. My doc and I figured I would very likely go to that date, if not a little later. Nov 25th put me at just over 38 weeks; not wanting S&J to have to hang around with no baby, we pushed back the travel date. Seth and Johnny, and Seth's parents came in on Thanksgiving evening.
What a fantastic Thanksgiving! My parents were here for the holiday, so they were able to meet everyone. We had a ton of food and good conversation. The travel itself was a different story, though. Well.... The travel was okay. It was getting into town that was the kicker. Someone in Phoenix, the connecting stop, fell down on the job that afternoon.... He or she neglected to load a whole bin of luggage onto the plane. And, yep, that's right- all of our party's luggage was in that bin. They had to wait until after 2pm the next day to get their things!!! And to add insult to injury, when they arrived in our fair city, the rental car place was out of cars. Oh yes, you read that right. Totally out of cars. Now I know we live in a smallish town, but seriously....... Good thing Chris and I decided to surprise them at the airport!!! Luckily, the reservation at the hotel was on file and they were able to check in without a hitch. And as of now, they have their rental along with all their things.
So now we wait. I'm 39.1 weeks today. The longest I've been pregnant. Will Baby Boy choose to come sometime today? I thought maybe so earlier. Now I'm not so certain. I had a night and early morning full of contractions, but now they've calmed down. My luck, it will happen at 2am, when I have to wake a babysitter for the kids and drag them all out of bed. Oh yeah, and my doctor is still out of town. I guess statistically I was bound to have a call doctor sooner or later. The first 4 babies were all delivered by my own doc, and that is a pretty rare thing. My next appointment is Tuesday morning. We may make it until then, who knows???
I just hope we don't have to wait on Little Mister too much longer. We're all very excited to meet him!
38 weeks and counting in this pic.
The big question at the end of a surro pregnancy (other than when will the baby get here) is when should the parents come to town?
Our plan was for S&J to head to town last Monday, November 25th. But then some things came up, and it turned out that they weren't going to have the time they were expecting to just hang out and wait for baby like we all thought they would. This turn of events caused us to start playing the "when is the best time to come out" game.... Unfortunately, there is just no way to tell. A lot of surros will schedule an elective induction to give their IPs an end date to the pregnancy. Even though babies don't always follow best laid plans (Miss Mia.....), it at least gives a jumping off point for planning travel. We decided not to do that this time; S&J want Baby Boy to come when he is ready, and not when we are ready for him. Also, my doc went out of town for the Thanksgiving holiday- so scheduling an induction with an absent doc is a little tricky. Every week at my appointments we tried to gauge if anything was happening in there. And every week, it was a resounding NO! Little Mister seems perfectly content to hang out and be all cozy in my uterus. And apparently, my uterus likes him there and is not interested in kicking him out.
So, travel plans were changed. I delivered two of our babies at 39.1 weeks; the longest I was ever pregnant. My doc and I figured I would very likely go to that date, if not a little later. Nov 25th put me at just over 38 weeks; not wanting S&J to have to hang around with no baby, we pushed back the travel date. Seth and Johnny, and Seth's parents came in on Thanksgiving evening.
What a fantastic Thanksgiving! My parents were here for the holiday, so they were able to meet everyone. We had a ton of food and good conversation. The travel itself was a different story, though. Well.... The travel was okay. It was getting into town that was the kicker. Someone in Phoenix, the connecting stop, fell down on the job that afternoon.... He or she neglected to load a whole bin of luggage onto the plane. And, yep, that's right- all of our party's luggage was in that bin. They had to wait until after 2pm the next day to get their things!!! And to add insult to injury, when they arrived in our fair city, the rental car place was out of cars. Oh yes, you read that right. Totally out of cars. Now I know we live in a smallish town, but seriously....... Good thing Chris and I decided to surprise them at the airport!!! Luckily, the reservation at the hotel was on file and they were able to check in without a hitch. And as of now, they have their rental along with all their things.
So now we wait. I'm 39.1 weeks today. The longest I've been pregnant. Will Baby Boy choose to come sometime today? I thought maybe so earlier. Now I'm not so certain. I had a night and early morning full of contractions, but now they've calmed down. My luck, it will happen at 2am, when I have to wake a babysitter for the kids and drag them all out of bed. Oh yeah, and my doctor is still out of town. I guess statistically I was bound to have a call doctor sooner or later. The first 4 babies were all delivered by my own doc, and that is a pretty rare thing. My next appointment is Tuesday morning. We may make it until then, who knows???
I just hope we don't have to wait on Little Mister too much longer. We're all very excited to meet him!
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Playing catch up
So I've been falling way behind on posting. The time is going by so fast that I think of updating, then a week flies by and I realize I haven't written.....
I'm 36 weeks now, going to be 37 on Friday. The baby is getting bigger, he moves all the time, and I am starting to get uncomfortable. I'm in that weird in-between time- my body is getting tired and is about ready for kiddo to vacate; but I'm not ready for the pregnancy to be over yet either. I love the time that I get to carry this baby, the time that our family has to care for him. We are all super excited for his delivery, to see what he looks like, and to meet him "on the outside"- not to mention SO excited to see him with his family for the first time. But all of those incredibly special things mean that our time with him are just about over. Certainly a bittersweet transition.
I wish I had a crystal ball that predicted labor, too. It would be way easier to plan when to bring S&J to town and when to have things ready if we knew even the day.... But, as it has been with childbirth since the dawn of time, there is just no real way to know. I'm contracting quite a bit, but it's sporadic. Some days I contract all day on and off, and other days I don't have any contractions at all. I'm not sleeping well- during the days between my work shifts especially, but that is pretty normal for me this close to the end. Kiddo seems to be pretty low, but sometimes that doesn't mean anything. I love feeling him rock and roll in there, and it's kind of cool (and sometimes a little Alien creepy) to see him move. He has been getting the hiccups daily now, and can't decide if he wants to be head down or breech. That has been our adventure of the last week......
Baby Boy has decided to give me some extra anxiety and a few sleepless moments. He has spent much of the last week breech or transverse (sideways) in there. Of course today, for the doc, he was firmly head down. My doc assures me that he should stay that way from now on. But none of the other kiddos I carried flipped out of vertex this late. So I'm a little concerned that he will be in a "bad" position when I go into labor. I'm not dying to experience a c/s; at all.
I think his impending arrival has hit just about every one of us this last week. From S&J trying to pinpoint a day to come out and getting their bags packed, to me and Chris arranging for midnight babysitters if needed and me thinking about getting a bag packed for the hospital.... We're all preparing for these final weeks and the imminent arrival of a new baby. It's such a far off concept for so long- a baby is coming- to Boom!!! a BABY is going to be here. Soon.
It's a little hard to wrap my head around that it's almost over.
A little sneak peek of some pictures I had taken. Me and Baby Boy are about 33 and a half weeks.
I'm 36 weeks now, going to be 37 on Friday. The baby is getting bigger, he moves all the time, and I am starting to get uncomfortable. I'm in that weird in-between time- my body is getting tired and is about ready for kiddo to vacate; but I'm not ready for the pregnancy to be over yet either. I love the time that I get to carry this baby, the time that our family has to care for him. We are all super excited for his delivery, to see what he looks like, and to meet him "on the outside"- not to mention SO excited to see him with his family for the first time. But all of those incredibly special things mean that our time with him are just about over. Certainly a bittersweet transition.
I wish I had a crystal ball that predicted labor, too. It would be way easier to plan when to bring S&J to town and when to have things ready if we knew even the day.... But, as it has been with childbirth since the dawn of time, there is just no real way to know. I'm contracting quite a bit, but it's sporadic. Some days I contract all day on and off, and other days I don't have any contractions at all. I'm not sleeping well- during the days between my work shifts especially, but that is pretty normal for me this close to the end. Kiddo seems to be pretty low, but sometimes that doesn't mean anything. I love feeling him rock and roll in there, and it's kind of cool (and sometimes a little Alien creepy) to see him move. He has been getting the hiccups daily now, and can't decide if he wants to be head down or breech. That has been our adventure of the last week......
Baby Boy has decided to give me some extra anxiety and a few sleepless moments. He has spent much of the last week breech or transverse (sideways) in there. Of course today, for the doc, he was firmly head down. My doc assures me that he should stay that way from now on. But none of the other kiddos I carried flipped out of vertex this late. So I'm a little concerned that he will be in a "bad" position when I go into labor. I'm not dying to experience a c/s; at all.
I think his impending arrival has hit just about every one of us this last week. From S&J trying to pinpoint a day to come out and getting their bags packed, to me and Chris arranging for midnight babysitters if needed and me thinking about getting a bag packed for the hospital.... We're all preparing for these final weeks and the imminent arrival of a new baby. It's such a far off concept for so long- a baby is coming- to Boom!!! a BABY is going to be here. Soon.
It's a little hard to wrap my head around that it's almost over.
A little sneak peek of some pictures I had taken. Me and Baby Boy are about 33 and a half weeks.
Monday, October 14, 2013
Adventures in Baby-sitting... uh... Showers
The primary reason for our trip our to the east coast was for Seth and Johnny's baby shower. We had been together since Thursday afternoon, and were having a great time catching up and just being together. When Saturday morning rolled around, it was time to pack up and drive to NJ.
We all piled into the new VW wagon and headed north. Everyone was concerned that we were going to be in the car for so long on Saturday getting there. It takes us 7 hours to get to Chris's family and 6 hours to get to mine by car; we were anticipating about a 3 hour car ride to get to Seth's family. So really, it was a drop in the bucket for us, but we were appreciative of the concern.
I won't lie. I was a little nervous to get there and meet everyone. Crowds of people I don't know make me anxious. I was hoping there would only be a few people there and that we could trickle into it slowly. Don't get me wrong- I was very excited for the party, and wanted to meet everyone, but I knew there would be a crowd.
The car ride, just like everything else on our vacay, went very fast- before I knew it, we were driving into a beautiful neighborhood and pulling up to a beautiful house. With people out front. Seth's brother and his family were already there along with his parents and I think one of his aunts (it has all run together a little for me by now...). Meeting the family there was pretty great. There was such a feeling of warmth, love, and excitement in the house. Chris and I were welcomed with open arms and made to feel right at home with great big hugs and lots of smiles. It wasn't as overwhelming as I was afraid it was going to be.
When we got there, everyone was finishing up with last minute details before the party. I wandered around to get a look at things. There was so much time, effort, and thought that went into planning S&J's shower.... I could tell that Seth's mom- and his family- were SO excited for them. Seth's mom even made ME a sash to wear during the shower!!! Lol. I'm pretty sure my face was red when she draped it around me. I really cringe at being the center of anyone's attention- but everyone wanted me and Chris to feel special for the day too.
Before too long, people started showing up. There were more introductions, more hugs, smiles, and talking. There was fantastic food, and we got to meet some amazing people. Jason, his parents, and Mia were able to be there as well- but that's another story. :) Needless to say I cried when I saw them, and it was all I could do not to hover around Mia the whole time.
After an enormous, tasty ice cream cake (yes, I ate TWO pieces), we finally managed to get S&J to break into their very large pile of gifts. The day was winding down, and it seemed that it was mostly close family and friends who were still at the house. It was so much fun for me to watch them open their gifts, and to see their faces light up imagining their little boy who was going to be using all the new, tiny (or not so tiny) things. Their family and friends were so amazingly generous and thoughtful.
Chris and I left later that evening; Seth's parent's had very thoughtfully provided us our own hotel room to stay in overnight. I left the house that night marveling at the family and friends we met through the course of the day. Chris and I both come from loving and supportive families, so it's not that I was expecting Seth & Johnny's family to be any different. And we've known for a long time that S&J are going to be amazing parents. But it was heartwarming and peaceful to know that this Baby Boy is coming into such a large loving, supportive environment. He will be cherished by so many people, as every baby deserves to be.
We all piled into the new VW wagon and headed north. Everyone was concerned that we were going to be in the car for so long on Saturday getting there. It takes us 7 hours to get to Chris's family and 6 hours to get to mine by car; we were anticipating about a 3 hour car ride to get to Seth's family. So really, it was a drop in the bucket for us, but we were appreciative of the concern.
I won't lie. I was a little nervous to get there and meet everyone. Crowds of people I don't know make me anxious. I was hoping there would only be a few people there and that we could trickle into it slowly. Don't get me wrong- I was very excited for the party, and wanted to meet everyone, but I knew there would be a crowd.
The car ride, just like everything else on our vacay, went very fast- before I knew it, we were driving into a beautiful neighborhood and pulling up to a beautiful house. With people out front. Seth's brother and his family were already there along with his parents and I think one of his aunts (it has all run together a little for me by now...). Meeting the family there was pretty great. There was such a feeling of warmth, love, and excitement in the house. Chris and I were welcomed with open arms and made to feel right at home with great big hugs and lots of smiles. It wasn't as overwhelming as I was afraid it was going to be.
When we got there, everyone was finishing up with last minute details before the party. I wandered around to get a look at things. There was so much time, effort, and thought that went into planning S&J's shower.... I could tell that Seth's mom- and his family- were SO excited for them. Seth's mom even made ME a sash to wear during the shower!!! Lol. I'm pretty sure my face was red when she draped it around me. I really cringe at being the center of anyone's attention- but everyone wanted me and Chris to feel special for the day too.
Before too long, people started showing up. There were more introductions, more hugs, smiles, and talking. There was fantastic food, and we got to meet some amazing people. Jason, his parents, and Mia were able to be there as well- but that's another story. :) Needless to say I cried when I saw them, and it was all I could do not to hover around Mia the whole time.
After an enormous, tasty ice cream cake (yes, I ate TWO pieces), we finally managed to get S&J to break into their very large pile of gifts. The day was winding down, and it seemed that it was mostly close family and friends who were still at the house. It was so much fun for me to watch them open their gifts, and to see their faces light up imagining their little boy who was going to be using all the new, tiny (or not so tiny) things. Their family and friends were so amazingly generous and thoughtful.
Chris and I left later that evening; Seth's parent's had very thoughtfully provided us our own hotel room to stay in overnight. I left the house that night marveling at the family and friends we met through the course of the day. Chris and I both come from loving and supportive families, so it's not that I was expecting Seth & Johnny's family to be any different. And we've known for a long time that S&J are going to be amazing parents. But it was heartwarming and peaceful to know that this Baby Boy is coming into such a large loving, supportive environment. He will be cherished by so many people, as every baby deserves to be.
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Our trip in a snapshot
Chris and I just got home from our trip to Washington DC and New Jersey. We had such an incredible time, and I want to share it all!!! But I don't even really know where to start. :)
We had been looking forward to this trip for quite some time. I spent the last week at home with a weird work schedule and a crazy time trying to get everything in the house ready for our trip. I am a master procrastinator, so there were things left over that could have been done in the weeks prior. In any event, it was time for us to leave before we knew it.
We lamented just a little that the federal government was shut down- after all, we were going to be in Washington DC, and had planned on trying to get in some of that touristy stuff. This is what our trip looked like: Fly into DC on Thursday, mid-afternoon arrival. Hang out on Friday. Drive to NJ Saturday morning for the shower on Saturday afternoon. Brunch in NJ on Sunday morning, then drive back to DC. Leave Monday afternoon for home. To be fair, that is a LOT of things to do already. Maybe the shutdown was a blessing in disguise for us..... We would have crammed in some sightseeing, but I think we all would have been over- exhausted if we had done that.
Chris and I are positive that there is some weird time warp in DC, though. We arrived in the afternoon, before rush hour and were greeted at the airport by Johnny. Then on to home where Seth and his brother Jared were waiting. Then we blinked and it was after 11!!! Jared went home, and we ate dinner in that time, but still.... Friday was the same. We were up by 9 in the morning, but it was one in the afternoon and time for lunch before we knew what happened! Seth took us on a walking tour of their neighborhood, and to a really yummy pizza place for lunch. (City living vs out west living is very different. I could write a whole post just on that!) The plan that night was for dinner and a movie in. Well, we had a fantastic lasagna, but somehow we missed starting the movie and it was after midnight.... I'm pretty sure we didn't even stop in NJ. I feel like we got in the car, got out, got in, and ended up in DC again!
Now, all the sneaky boys in my life conspired to surprise me on Sunday night when we got back to DC. As far as I knew, we were going to go to this fabulous Mexican restaurant for dinner. And then try again for that darn movie. Well, little did I know that they were all texting back and forth to each other (in the car right around me!!!) and to my friend who lives in the DC area. We hadn't seen each other in about 9 years, and the boys were coordinating our time so she could meet us at the Mexican place for dinner too! I was already sad that I hadn't had a chance to contact her to see if she was free for a meal or coffee. Seriously, how often am I on that side of the country??? And Chris played right along with it when I said something to him. All, "yeah, I don't think we're going to be able to fit it in this trip...". When Chris walked in the door with my friend, it was dim and I didn't have my glasses on. All I could think was "Who is that woman with Chris??? Someone just stopped by to see Seth & Johnny??? Damn it, I'm hungry!!!". It took me about 5 full seconds to realize that it was my friend.... Off to dinner we went. The Mexican place was fantastic, with some of the best salsa I've ever had. But the highlight (of course) was getting to catch up with my friend. In person. :)
Monday morning, Johnny had to head back to work. Boo. Chris, Seth, and I finally got that movie in, but before we were ready or prepared for it, it was time to get our stuff packed and ready for the flight home. It's amazing how slowly the time goes when you are waiting for something- but how quickly it goes when you want it to drag on. Goodbyes suck. The only thing that made it even partly okay to be saying goodbye after such a short time was knowing that we would see each other again in a matter of just weeks. Wow. Just a few weeks and Baby Boy will be here.......
It was so fantastic to see Johnny and Seth again, finally, after almost a year. I am amazed every day at the relationship we have formed with these two wonderful men. After more than a year and all our experiences together, they are more than just our "intended fathers". They are our family.
We had been looking forward to this trip for quite some time. I spent the last week at home with a weird work schedule and a crazy time trying to get everything in the house ready for our trip. I am a master procrastinator, so there were things left over that could have been done in the weeks prior. In any event, it was time for us to leave before we knew it.
We lamented just a little that the federal government was shut down- after all, we were going to be in Washington DC, and had planned on trying to get in some of that touristy stuff. This is what our trip looked like: Fly into DC on Thursday, mid-afternoon arrival. Hang out on Friday. Drive to NJ Saturday morning for the shower on Saturday afternoon. Brunch in NJ on Sunday morning, then drive back to DC. Leave Monday afternoon for home. To be fair, that is a LOT of things to do already. Maybe the shutdown was a blessing in disguise for us..... We would have crammed in some sightseeing, but I think we all would have been over- exhausted if we had done that.
Chris and I are positive that there is some weird time warp in DC, though. We arrived in the afternoon, before rush hour and were greeted at the airport by Johnny. Then on to home where Seth and his brother Jared were waiting. Then we blinked and it was after 11!!! Jared went home, and we ate dinner in that time, but still.... Friday was the same. We were up by 9 in the morning, but it was one in the afternoon and time for lunch before we knew what happened! Seth took us on a walking tour of their neighborhood, and to a really yummy pizza place for lunch. (City living vs out west living is very different. I could write a whole post just on that!) The plan that night was for dinner and a movie in. Well, we had a fantastic lasagna, but somehow we missed starting the movie and it was after midnight.... I'm pretty sure we didn't even stop in NJ. I feel like we got in the car, got out, got in, and ended up in DC again!
Now, all the sneaky boys in my life conspired to surprise me on Sunday night when we got back to DC. As far as I knew, we were going to go to this fabulous Mexican restaurant for dinner. And then try again for that darn movie. Well, little did I know that they were all texting back and forth to each other (in the car right around me!!!) and to my friend who lives in the DC area. We hadn't seen each other in about 9 years, and the boys were coordinating our time so she could meet us at the Mexican place for dinner too! I was already sad that I hadn't had a chance to contact her to see if she was free for a meal or coffee. Seriously, how often am I on that side of the country??? And Chris played right along with it when I said something to him. All, "yeah, I don't think we're going to be able to fit it in this trip...". When Chris walked in the door with my friend, it was dim and I didn't have my glasses on. All I could think was "Who is that woman with Chris??? Someone just stopped by to see Seth & Johnny??? Damn it, I'm hungry!!!". It took me about 5 full seconds to realize that it was my friend.... Off to dinner we went. The Mexican place was fantastic, with some of the best salsa I've ever had. But the highlight (of course) was getting to catch up with my friend. In person. :)
Monday morning, Johnny had to head back to work. Boo. Chris, Seth, and I finally got that movie in, but before we were ready or prepared for it, it was time to get our stuff packed and ready for the flight home. It's amazing how slowly the time goes when you are waiting for something- but how quickly it goes when you want it to drag on. Goodbyes suck. The only thing that made it even partly okay to be saying goodbye after such a short time was knowing that we would see each other again in a matter of just weeks. Wow. Just a few weeks and Baby Boy will be here.......
It was so fantastic to see Johnny and Seth again, finally, after almost a year. I am amazed every day at the relationship we have formed with these two wonderful men. After more than a year and all our experiences together, they are more than just our "intended fathers". They are our family.
Monday, September 23, 2013
I'm turning into a slacker...
Wow. Long time, no post. Really long time....
It's not just school starting, and being busy, and all that. Everything is going along just as it should right now. Thankfully, there isn't anything "exciting" happening, and I don't think that anyone wants to read about the mundane day- to- day things.
Let's see if I can play catch up a little. I'm 29 and a half weeks now, and it boggles my mind that I only have about 10 weeks left with this little person inside me. It is going to be over before I know it. He is moving all the time now, and seems to be in a good position. He really likes music, and deep voices. His movements always pick up when we've been quiet for awhile, then Chris starts talking. He also moves a lot when Finn is around, but he's just loud. I'm starting to get super hot at night now, but not quite all the time yet. It's perfect that the weather is starting to cool down a little. My shoes are starting to get tight at work, so it looks like I'm starting to swell a little. I finally caved and bought those compression hose. But you know what? They work! I wore them on a recent road trip, and they made a huge difference. I'm planning to wear them on our DC adventure. Well, the flight, anyway.
Speaking of which.... That's coming up in just a week and a half!!! I won't lie. I'm not looking forward to the flight, but I'm SO excited for the rest of the trip! We get to see S&J again after almost a year, we get to go to DC, we get to meet more of the family, and we are going to have an awesome baby shower- that's a lot of great things to look forward to. And Jason, his mom, and Mia will likely be at the baby shower- talk about a bonus! After the trip and the shower, the "end" (for me anyway) is going to be in sight. It's such a bittersweet thing. I'm so excited for Baby Boy to finally meet and go home with S&J, but at the same time that means our time with him is over. It is something that is inevitable, and heartwarming, and a smidge sad all wrapped into one.
Our new "baby" came home 2 weeks ago, though. Our road trip was to travel to Oregon to pick up our puppy, Astrid. Whew, puppies are HARD!!! The first week she was home, I would have been happy to trade her for another human newborn. But every day gets better and better, and we are learning to be a "pack" for her.
Here's hoping I do a better job with the updates!!!
It's not just school starting, and being busy, and all that. Everything is going along just as it should right now. Thankfully, there isn't anything "exciting" happening, and I don't think that anyone wants to read about the mundane day- to- day things.
Let's see if I can play catch up a little. I'm 29 and a half weeks now, and it boggles my mind that I only have about 10 weeks left with this little person inside me. It is going to be over before I know it. He is moving all the time now, and seems to be in a good position. He really likes music, and deep voices. His movements always pick up when we've been quiet for awhile, then Chris starts talking. He also moves a lot when Finn is around, but he's just loud. I'm starting to get super hot at night now, but not quite all the time yet. It's perfect that the weather is starting to cool down a little. My shoes are starting to get tight at work, so it looks like I'm starting to swell a little. I finally caved and bought those compression hose. But you know what? They work! I wore them on a recent road trip, and they made a huge difference. I'm planning to wear them on our DC adventure. Well, the flight, anyway.
Speaking of which.... That's coming up in just a week and a half!!! I won't lie. I'm not looking forward to the flight, but I'm SO excited for the rest of the trip! We get to see S&J again after almost a year, we get to go to DC, we get to meet more of the family, and we are going to have an awesome baby shower- that's a lot of great things to look forward to. And Jason, his mom, and Mia will likely be at the baby shower- talk about a bonus! After the trip and the shower, the "end" (for me anyway) is going to be in sight. It's such a bittersweet thing. I'm so excited for Baby Boy to finally meet and go home with S&J, but at the same time that means our time with him is over. It is something that is inevitable, and heartwarming, and a smidge sad all wrapped into one.
Our new "baby" came home 2 weeks ago, though. Our road trip was to travel to Oregon to pick up our puppy, Astrid. Whew, puppies are HARD!!! The first week she was home, I would have been happy to trade her for another human newborn. But every day gets better and better, and we are learning to be a "pack" for her.
Here's hoping I do a better job with the updates!!!
Friday, August 23, 2013
25 week update
The time just keeps flying by!
All is well and moving right along. I saw the doc last week, and Baby is growing just like he needs to be. His heartbeat was perfect, I got a prescription for heartburn meds (whew!), and another script for some really HOT compression hose. I notice that my feet are starting to swell slightly at the end of my shifts at work and I'm going to need the hose when we fly back east in October. Might as well make use of them now....
I also had to do my one hour glucose test. I have a history of gestational diabetes with my first pregnancy (I'll get to THAT in a minute), so my doc does the test about 4 weeks earlier than "normal". I was lucky enough to pass the 1 hour my second, third, and fourth pregnancies; this time not so much. :( I "failed" it by 15 points- either because I was sick with a stomach virus when I took it, because I didn't have any protein before the test (thank you stomach virus), or because I was destined to have GDM. Again. Ugh. So that meant I had to come back for the three hour test.
Fast forward to this week. The syrupy, gross glucose drink they give you for the one hour is bad enough. For the three hour test, you have to drink three times as much of the stuff! You have 5 minutes to get it all in, but really it's just best to chug it all down. You have three flavor choices: orange, lemon lime, and fruit punch. Pretty sure the stuff could pass for sno-cone syrup.... I chose the fruit punch for my one hour (maybe THAT was the problem, I always choose orange) and I "failed", so I went with the orange for the three hour. Gag. Oh! And you have to be fasting for 10-12 hours before hand. All that sugar hitting an empty stomach. So, I went in, had my fasting blood draw- not a finger poke, but an actual blood draw, drank my syrup and then waited.
By the one hour draw, I had a bit of a queasy unsettled feeling in my stomach. By two hours I was nauseous, headachy, and a little light headed. By three hours I felt super gross and was ready to bolt out of there and get something to eat. Luckily I had plans to meet a friend for lunch at a local Mexican place. With a nice, carb filled tortilla wrapped burrito. Best. Burrito. Ever.
But I passed!!! No gestational diabetes for me.
I did have one value that was high- my second hour, which strikes me as odd. But one elevated value out of the four draws is allowed. You are diagnosed with two or more abnormals. So, back to my first pregnancy.... I am positive that I only had one abnormal with those 4 draws, too. I was at a different clinic at the time though, and they diagnosed me and made me do all the gestational diabetes things. I have a friend who recently delivered who sees a doc in my old clinic- she had to do her three hour test as well and had one abnormal, and her doc tried to diagnose her too!!! She checked her (perfectly normal) blood sugars for 4 days though, and talked her doc out of the diagnosis. Smart lady.
In other news, the baby is big enough now that we can see him move. And Chris and the kids have all felt him move too. They think it's pretty cool. And so do I. :)
All is well and moving right along. I saw the doc last week, and Baby is growing just like he needs to be. His heartbeat was perfect, I got a prescription for heartburn meds (whew!), and another script for some really HOT compression hose. I notice that my feet are starting to swell slightly at the end of my shifts at work and I'm going to need the hose when we fly back east in October. Might as well make use of them now....
I also had to do my one hour glucose test. I have a history of gestational diabetes with my first pregnancy (I'll get to THAT in a minute), so my doc does the test about 4 weeks earlier than "normal". I was lucky enough to pass the 1 hour my second, third, and fourth pregnancies; this time not so much. :( I "failed" it by 15 points- either because I was sick with a stomach virus when I took it, because I didn't have any protein before the test (thank you stomach virus), or because I was destined to have GDM. Again. Ugh. So that meant I had to come back for the three hour test.
Fast forward to this week. The syrupy, gross glucose drink they give you for the one hour is bad enough. For the three hour test, you have to drink three times as much of the stuff! You have 5 minutes to get it all in, but really it's just best to chug it all down. You have three flavor choices: orange, lemon lime, and fruit punch. Pretty sure the stuff could pass for sno-cone syrup.... I chose the fruit punch for my one hour (maybe THAT was the problem, I always choose orange) and I "failed", so I went with the orange for the three hour. Gag. Oh! And you have to be fasting for 10-12 hours before hand. All that sugar hitting an empty stomach. So, I went in, had my fasting blood draw- not a finger poke, but an actual blood draw, drank my syrup and then waited.
By the one hour draw, I had a bit of a queasy unsettled feeling in my stomach. By two hours I was nauseous, headachy, and a little light headed. By three hours I felt super gross and was ready to bolt out of there and get something to eat. Luckily I had plans to meet a friend for lunch at a local Mexican place. With a nice, carb filled tortilla wrapped burrito. Best. Burrito. Ever.
But I passed!!! No gestational diabetes for me.
I did have one value that was high- my second hour, which strikes me as odd. But one elevated value out of the four draws is allowed. You are diagnosed with two or more abnormals. So, back to my first pregnancy.... I am positive that I only had one abnormal with those 4 draws, too. I was at a different clinic at the time though, and they diagnosed me and made me do all the gestational diabetes things. I have a friend who recently delivered who sees a doc in my old clinic- she had to do her three hour test as well and had one abnormal, and her doc tried to diagnose her too!!! She checked her (perfectly normal) blood sugars for 4 days though, and talked her doc out of the diagnosis. Smart lady.
In other news, the baby is big enough now that we can see him move. And Chris and the kids have all felt him move too. They think it's pretty cool. And so do I. :)
Friday, August 9, 2013
23 and counting
23 weeks today! The time just seems to be sliding by. I was talking to a friend earlier this week and was a little surprised to say that I only have 4 months left before Baby comes.... It's going to go by SO fast! The kids will go back to school in a couple weeks, we'll be getting the house ready for our puppy then going to pick her up, then our trip out to DC. After that it's holidays, and birthdays, and then the baby. I'll blink and it will be here!
Everything has been going well the last couple of weeks. I'm feeling good, and the baby is growing. One of my patients at work was horrified when I told her I wasn't due until December- she asked if there were "two in there".... Lol. Lucky for me, I think those comments are pretty funny and I don't get offended. I've always said I'd rather be obviously, roundly pregnant than one of those you have to guess about.
We're at the very outer edges of viability, so I'm hoping these next few weeks go by rather quickly. I generally try to NOT wish away any time during my pregnancy, but these weeks can be the scariest. I'd pretty much be happy if I could stay home in a bubble for the next 2-3 weeks. I don't have a history of preterm labor or delivery at all, but I think every labor nurse (or ex labor nurse) worth her salt is a little nervous around this time. Little Mister in there needs to stay put. Until the end of November at the earliest.
Next up: My one hour glucose test next week. Fingers crossed against gestational diabetes, folks!
Everything has been going well the last couple of weeks. I'm feeling good, and the baby is growing. One of my patients at work was horrified when I told her I wasn't due until December- she asked if there were "two in there".... Lol. Lucky for me, I think those comments are pretty funny and I don't get offended. I've always said I'd rather be obviously, roundly pregnant than one of those you have to guess about.
We're at the very outer edges of viability, so I'm hoping these next few weeks go by rather quickly. I generally try to NOT wish away any time during my pregnancy, but these weeks can be the scariest. I'd pretty much be happy if I could stay home in a bubble for the next 2-3 weeks. I don't have a history of preterm labor or delivery at all, but I think every labor nurse (or ex labor nurse) worth her salt is a little nervous around this time. Little Mister in there needs to stay put. Until the end of November at the earliest.
Next up: My one hour glucose test next week. Fingers crossed against gestational diabetes, folks!
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
And it's a........
BOY!!!
We had our anatomy scan, well a couple weeks ago now. Between work and vacation, I haven't been the greatest at updating what's going on. The scan went better than expected, as my appointment was just a smidge early at 18.4 weeks. The tech was able to see all the parts she needed to, and everything was in perfect working order. We looked at Baby's heart, brain, spine, internal organs, blood flow, cord, placenta, and a few others I'm sure I'm forgetting. Then we had the "fun shots" where we got to see hands and feet, and a little face. And of, course, that all important "It's a Boy!" shot.
I'm still not feeling this kiddo move as much as I like. He is moving for me, and it's getting stronger by the day. But that dang anterior placenta is really hampering my ability to feel him. I've had anterior placentas before, but this one must be in just the "right" spot.
I'm done with all the first trimester symptoms, though some days I still find that I'm really tired. Those days, I just tell myself that he is growing. My heartburn is pretty well under control- as long as I remember to take my meds, and my appetite is back to normal. My itching is getting bad again, similar to when I was pregnant with Mia. I don't really like a lot of fabrics- or anything- close to my skin. So I've really appreciated being able to wear a lot of loose dresses and skirts this summer. There have been many times in the last few weeks where I have wished I could wear them to work, too! I've been enjoying Eggo waffles for breakfast almost every morning- a food I never eat when I'm not pregnant, and I'm starting to crave red meat again. In past pregnancies, this has been a sign of anemia in me, so I'll have to have that checked out at my next appointment.
I can't believe we're halfway through this pregnancy!!!
Here is the profile pic the tech got at the anatomy scan. It's a little blurry, but kiddo was very active too.
We had our anatomy scan, well a couple weeks ago now. Between work and vacation, I haven't been the greatest at updating what's going on. The scan went better than expected, as my appointment was just a smidge early at 18.4 weeks. The tech was able to see all the parts she needed to, and everything was in perfect working order. We looked at Baby's heart, brain, spine, internal organs, blood flow, cord, placenta, and a few others I'm sure I'm forgetting. Then we had the "fun shots" where we got to see hands and feet, and a little face. And of, course, that all important "It's a Boy!" shot.
I'm still not feeling this kiddo move as much as I like. He is moving for me, and it's getting stronger by the day. But that dang anterior placenta is really hampering my ability to feel him. I've had anterior placentas before, but this one must be in just the "right" spot.
I'm done with all the first trimester symptoms, though some days I still find that I'm really tired. Those days, I just tell myself that he is growing. My heartburn is pretty well under control- as long as I remember to take my meds, and my appetite is back to normal. My itching is getting bad again, similar to when I was pregnant with Mia. I don't really like a lot of fabrics- or anything- close to my skin. So I've really appreciated being able to wear a lot of loose dresses and skirts this summer. There have been many times in the last few weeks where I have wished I could wear them to work, too! I've been enjoying Eggo waffles for breakfast almost every morning- a food I never eat when I'm not pregnant, and I'm starting to crave red meat again. In past pregnancies, this has been a sign of anemia in me, so I'll have to have that checked out at my next appointment.
I can't believe we're halfway through this pregnancy!!!
Here is the profile pic the tech got at the anatomy scan. It's a little blurry, but kiddo was very active too.
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
We're "expecting" too!!!
Wait! What??? How can our family be expecting too? Well, we finally decided that it is time to add a puppy to our family. We have decided on a Siberian Husky, and are waiting on a littler that is due on the 17th of this month. So hopefully sometime in the next week! Then we will have to wait until September to bring our puppy home.
What does this have to do with surrogacy, you ask?
Well, when you're pregnant and adding a baby to your own family there is definitely an air of excited expectation. Your family has to get ready- choosing a name, buying supplies, getting a room ready... all those kinds of things. Carrying a surro baby, our family really doesn't have those things to look forward to. Instead, we get to see Seth and Johnny making these preparations. I'm having so much fun hearing about how they are going to decorate the nursery, and speculating about whether they are having a boy or a girl. And it's driving me crazy that they won't tell me the names they have chosen! I mean, I'd even take the top three!!! ;) Chris and I have even been invited to attend their baby shower in October- so we're making plans to be there.
Now we have this puppy coming home to our family, and the puppy isn't even born yet. So (in a very small way, I'm sure) I feel a bit like I imagine intended parents feel. I'm anticipating the delivery, checking the breeder website multiple times a day for updates. Chris and I have been talking about what changes will have to happen in our house for the puppy to come home. We've been looking at crates, and toys, and dog runs. And it took us almost two weeks to decide on a name that we are both happy with. Very reminiscent of when we had our children....
Wishing that my breeder would update her website more often reminds me to keep the guys in the loop with what is happening here. We're definitely in that calmer part of the pregnancy where something new doesn't happen every day. And while this is my fifth pregnancy, it is still their first.
Here's to happy waiting all around!!!
This is our puppy's mom, Kady.
And this is our puppy's dad, Matar (like the "Mater" in Cars.)
If you are interested in peeking at our breeder site, the address is:
www.phichas-siberians.com
What does this have to do with surrogacy, you ask?
Well, when you're pregnant and adding a baby to your own family there is definitely an air of excited expectation. Your family has to get ready- choosing a name, buying supplies, getting a room ready... all those kinds of things. Carrying a surro baby, our family really doesn't have those things to look forward to. Instead, we get to see Seth and Johnny making these preparations. I'm having so much fun hearing about how they are going to decorate the nursery, and speculating about whether they are having a boy or a girl. And it's driving me crazy that they won't tell me the names they have chosen! I mean, I'd even take the top three!!! ;) Chris and I have even been invited to attend their baby shower in October- so we're making plans to be there.
Now we have this puppy coming home to our family, and the puppy isn't even born yet. So (in a very small way, I'm sure) I feel a bit like I imagine intended parents feel. I'm anticipating the delivery, checking the breeder website multiple times a day for updates. Chris and I have been talking about what changes will have to happen in our house for the puppy to come home. We've been looking at crates, and toys, and dog runs. And it took us almost two weeks to decide on a name that we are both happy with. Very reminiscent of when we had our children....
Wishing that my breeder would update her website more often reminds me to keep the guys in the loop with what is happening here. We're definitely in that calmer part of the pregnancy where something new doesn't happen every day. And while this is my fifth pregnancy, it is still their first.
Here's to happy waiting all around!!!
If you are interested in peeking at our breeder site, the address is:
www.phichas-siberians.com
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Just some pictures
Here are some pics I've gotten over the last few weeks.
Hmmmm..... Yep, that was at 13 weeks. I still say my tummy looks huge because of the angle. I was turned toward the mirror a little. But still.....
And here we are at 15 weeks. Told you it would be a pretty undeniable baby belly by then......
Baby is waving hello! Pretty awesome shot of a little hand.
Hmmmm..... Yep, that was at 13 weeks. I still say my tummy looks huge because of the angle. I was turned toward the mirror a little. But still.....
16 weeks! Sethbryo is definitely growing.
Monday, June 17, 2013
Little flutters
The thing I love the most about being pregnant is feeling the baby move and wiggle. I can put up with all the usual (and a couple not so usual) discomforts for that unique feeling of life growing inside of me. I'm a little bit of a worrywart until I can feel Baby moving, too. Thankfully I work in a place where I have access to a doppler and other instruments to check up on kiddo from time to time.
One of my friends, who is a week further along than I am, asked me if I was feeling anything yet- probably about a week ago. I told her a few little flutters here and there, but nothing definite or consistent. She said, "Oh I feel flutters every now and then too. And then 10 seconds later I fart." I laughed and laughed. That's one of the great mysteries around feeling the first "quickening" as the experts like to call it. Is that the baby, or is that just gas? Luckily there does come a time when there is no doubt that you are feeling Baby. That time is just a little different for everyone.
In the last two days, I've been pretty sure I'm feeling Sethbryo in there. The movements are small, and not predictable or consistent, but that's how it always starts for me. I could lay on the couch for hours just trying to pay attention to what is going on in my uterus. I don't, because there's not enough time in the day, but I could. It may take me a few more weeks to feel any bigger movements, though. My placenta is anterior (again) this pregnancy. Out of the 5 times I've carried, I've had 4 anterior placentas- so this is nothing new to me. "Anterior" just means that my placenta is hanging out in the front of my uterus- right in the part that curves outward to make that beautiful baby belly. It also means that it usually takes longer to feel good movement out of the baby. The placenta is in there, like a pillow, between the baby and the outside of my tummy. So the baby kicks, and it hits my placenta instead of the wall of my uterus- so it will take a stronger kick for me to feel anything. With my last pregnancy, I had my first ever posterior placenta- meaning that the placenta was on the opposite wall of my uterus, toward my back. I could feel little Miss Mia all the time by the time I hit 15 weeks, where I am now.
So, I'll have to be a little more patient. And pay attention to those little flutters I feel down low or to the side. By 18 weeks, I should be able to say that I'm feeling Sethbryo all the time, and I can't wait for that. It's one of my favorite feelings in the world.
One of my friends, who is a week further along than I am, asked me if I was feeling anything yet- probably about a week ago. I told her a few little flutters here and there, but nothing definite or consistent. She said, "Oh I feel flutters every now and then too. And then 10 seconds later I fart." I laughed and laughed. That's one of the great mysteries around feeling the first "quickening" as the experts like to call it. Is that the baby, or is that just gas? Luckily there does come a time when there is no doubt that you are feeling Baby. That time is just a little different for everyone.
In the last two days, I've been pretty sure I'm feeling Sethbryo in there. The movements are small, and not predictable or consistent, but that's how it always starts for me. I could lay on the couch for hours just trying to pay attention to what is going on in my uterus. I don't, because there's not enough time in the day, but I could. It may take me a few more weeks to feel any bigger movements, though. My placenta is anterior (again) this pregnancy. Out of the 5 times I've carried, I've had 4 anterior placentas- so this is nothing new to me. "Anterior" just means that my placenta is hanging out in the front of my uterus- right in the part that curves outward to make that beautiful baby belly. It also means that it usually takes longer to feel good movement out of the baby. The placenta is in there, like a pillow, between the baby and the outside of my tummy. So the baby kicks, and it hits my placenta instead of the wall of my uterus- so it will take a stronger kick for me to feel anything. With my last pregnancy, I had my first ever posterior placenta- meaning that the placenta was on the opposite wall of my uterus, toward my back. I could feel little Miss Mia all the time by the time I hit 15 weeks, where I am now.
So, I'll have to be a little more patient. And pay attention to those little flutters I feel down low or to the side. By 18 weeks, I should be able to say that I'm feeling Sethbryo all the time, and I can't wait for that. It's one of my favorite feelings in the world.
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
Into the mundane
12 and 13 weeks. Whew! Made it through the first trimester....
In the beginning, I feel like we're never going to get to this point. Meds and transfer, more meds and ultrasounds, going to two different doctors, constantly waiting for the results of something. With that all going on, who could think that the first trimester would drag by? Me. I'm always so glad to get to the end of the first trimester; Our risks for many different things decrease, I start to feel better, the baby gets much bigger, and I start to relax about it all a little more.
Awesome things that are happening: I'm done with all the clinic meds!!! No more shots, no more "gels", and no more extra pills. I'm on to just taking a prenatal vitamin and my daily acid reducer. I'm just starting to eek out of that "chubby" stage (well, to me anyway). I feel like things in the belly area are starting to look pretty round, and my patients are starting to give me the "are you pregnant, too???" eyeball. My nausea is pretty much gone, and the appetite is back to normal. This could be considered good or bad. ;)
The little discomforts: Well, I have raging heartburn if I forget a dose of zantac; good thing I stay prepared for that. I have more trouble day sleeping now between work shifts. This happened with my last pregnancy too. I sleep great for the first four or five hours, but if anything wakes me after that, I have a really hard time getting any more sleep. Staying hydrated is a challenge for me; but it always has been and it probably always will.
Things are going well, right on track. It won't be too much longer and I'll start feeling the baby move for sure. I get little flutters now, but hey, that may just be gas. This is the time that I say we slide into the mundane. Life slows down without a ton of doctor's appointments, everything gets pretty much back to normal, and I forget to blog. The milestones are fewer and farther between, and not a whole lot changes week to week. I might just have to start telling stories about my crazy kids instead.....
In the beginning, I feel like we're never going to get to this point. Meds and transfer, more meds and ultrasounds, going to two different doctors, constantly waiting for the results of something. With that all going on, who could think that the first trimester would drag by? Me. I'm always so glad to get to the end of the first trimester; Our risks for many different things decrease, I start to feel better, the baby gets much bigger, and I start to relax about it all a little more.
Awesome things that are happening: I'm done with all the clinic meds!!! No more shots, no more "gels", and no more extra pills. I'm on to just taking a prenatal vitamin and my daily acid reducer. I'm just starting to eek out of that "chubby" stage (well, to me anyway). I feel like things in the belly area are starting to look pretty round, and my patients are starting to give me the "are you pregnant, too???" eyeball. My nausea is pretty much gone, and the appetite is back to normal. This could be considered good or bad. ;)
The little discomforts: Well, I have raging heartburn if I forget a dose of zantac; good thing I stay prepared for that. I have more trouble day sleeping now between work shifts. This happened with my last pregnancy too. I sleep great for the first four or five hours, but if anything wakes me after that, I have a really hard time getting any more sleep. Staying hydrated is a challenge for me; but it always has been and it probably always will.
Things are going well, right on track. It won't be too much longer and I'll start feeling the baby move for sure. I get little flutters now, but hey, that may just be gas. This is the time that I say we slide into the mundane. Life slows down without a ton of doctor's appointments, everything gets pretty much back to normal, and I forget to blog. The milestones are fewer and farther between, and not a whole lot changes week to week. I might just have to start telling stories about my crazy kids instead.....
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
It's a baby, not a seahorse!!!
One thing I love about medical intervention to produce a pregnancy is the number of early ultrasounds one gets to have. Not very many people get to see the amazing progression from blast to embryo to fetus. I didn't get to see that when I was pregnant with our three kiddos. We got the 9 week early ultrasound shot to confirm a heartbeat, and then had to wait until the 20 week anatomy scan to see how our kiddos were growing. With our youngest, we did have the option of having an ultrasound between 11 and 13 weeks as part of the screening for Down's Syndrome- but we chose not to.
I showed this picture to Finn yesterday morning:
He said, "Awwwwwww, it's a seahorsey!!!" I said "No, buddy, that's a baby." And he said "Awwww, a baby seahorse!!!" So, apparently an embryo around 9 weeks old looks like a seahorse. Good to know. In our 9 week ultrasound photo, I didn't see a seahorse, but it did look like a little blob with a big head and a beating heart- right on track.
Today, I'm, 11 weeks and 4 days. So, it's been just about two weeks since my last ultrasound. It truly amazes me how much growth and development takes place in two weeks. There's a BABY in there. A little human looking baby! Okay, there are some alien-ish features, but still..... Definitely more human than alien. I'm in awe of the human body every time I'm lucky enough to monitor the pace of this development. We truly are amazing beings.
Baby has arms and legs, hands and feet. Sethbryo was rolling around, and kept bringing his/her hands up to his/ her face. We tried to get a good pic of the hands, but kiddo was moving too fast! Isn't it crazy how something the size of a lime looks like such a perfect human???
In other news, my nausea is almost gone. It's funny how you feel like hell all day long for weeks, and then you don't really even notice when you feel better. All the sudden you notice that you're hungry, and eating, and that you have been for two or three days. I still have my moments, but I'll take moments over all day long. I'm assuming that I'm starting to grow out of my regular clothes, but why lie? I haven't put on anything with a button and a zipper on the waistband for weeks now.... Who wants to do that when you can wear fabulously stretchy fabrics and elastic waistbands and get away with it??? And I'm lucky enough to look pretty round in the belly early on. I'm sure there are plenty of people who still think I'm just eating too many cookies- but I guarantee by week 15 there will be no denying that I'm rocking a baby belly.
So, things are right where they should be.
I showed this picture to Finn yesterday morning:
He said, "Awwwwwww, it's a seahorsey!!!" I said "No, buddy, that's a baby." And he said "Awwww, a baby seahorse!!!" So, apparently an embryo around 9 weeks old looks like a seahorse. Good to know. In our 9 week ultrasound photo, I didn't see a seahorse, but it did look like a little blob with a big head and a beating heart- right on track.
Today, I'm, 11 weeks and 4 days. So, it's been just about two weeks since my last ultrasound. It truly amazes me how much growth and development takes place in two weeks. There's a BABY in there. A little human looking baby! Okay, there are some alien-ish features, but still..... Definitely more human than alien. I'm in awe of the human body every time I'm lucky enough to monitor the pace of this development. We truly are amazing beings.
Baby has arms and legs, hands and feet. Sethbryo was rolling around, and kept bringing his/her hands up to his/ her face. We tried to get a good pic of the hands, but kiddo was moving too fast! Isn't it crazy how something the size of a lime looks like such a perfect human???
In other news, my nausea is almost gone. It's funny how you feel like hell all day long for weeks, and then you don't really even notice when you feel better. All the sudden you notice that you're hungry, and eating, and that you have been for two or three days. I still have my moments, but I'll take moments over all day long. I'm assuming that I'm starting to grow out of my regular clothes, but why lie? I haven't put on anything with a button and a zipper on the waistband for weeks now.... Who wants to do that when you can wear fabulously stretchy fabrics and elastic waistbands and get away with it??? And I'm lucky enough to look pretty round in the belly early on. I'm sure there are plenty of people who still think I'm just eating too many cookies- but I guarantee by week 15 there will be no denying that I'm rocking a baby belly.
So, things are right where they should be.
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
I graduated!!!
Well, we did it. We made it through the first 9 weeks! In IVF world, this means that I "graduate" from the clinic, and start going to appointments with my regular OB. I'm on a weaning schedule for the estradiol, progesterone, and baby aspirin that I am still taking, but the IVF clinic is no longer in charge of my care.
I had my first appointment with my own OB today. To be truthful, I had the tiny thought that I might get a little lecture for sitting in his office there again so soon. Mia is, after all, only just one. As I was walking in to the exam room, Dr. A was out in the hall saying goodbye to another patient. He saw me and smirked a little. I hid my face behind my "new pregnancy" folder. My nurse just laughed and said, "Busted!!!" Turns out Dr. A didn't have anything to say about the spacing of these pregnancies at all (whew!!!). He is very supportive of surrogacy, and he knows that I love to be pregnant- he just smiled and said "welcome back!". I got to see baby again this morning, too. It's amazing the changes that can take place over the course of five days. Little Sethbryo had a perfect heartbeat, and was rolling around and happy in there. :)
9 weeks- Graduation ultrasound
9 weeks, 5 days- 1st OB appt
I am still having some pretty awesome nausea- but not as often as I was before. I have left the all day nausea behind (for the most part), and have returned to feeling sick mostly in the evenings. My pregnancy BFF is showing herself already though...... hunka hunka burning... heart??? I keep hoping that I'll have at least one pregnancy where my chest doesn't feel like it's on fire from mid first trimester on. It seems that this will not be that pregnancy either. Ah, sweet sweet Zantac, how I love you.
On another note, my 16 week pregnant friend is jealous of my 8 week pregnant baby belly. No, for real. I keep telling her, you have to remember- this is #5!!! My body registers those pregnancy hormones, and that little beating heart and screams "WOOHOO!!!! Let's let it ALL hang out!!!". The "belly" in my pic is all leftover from previous pregnancies for sure, but I can't suck it in anymore.... ;)
I had my first appointment with my own OB today. To be truthful, I had the tiny thought that I might get a little lecture for sitting in his office there again so soon. Mia is, after all, only just one. As I was walking in to the exam room, Dr. A was out in the hall saying goodbye to another patient. He saw me and smirked a little. I hid my face behind my "new pregnancy" folder. My nurse just laughed and said, "Busted!!!" Turns out Dr. A didn't have anything to say about the spacing of these pregnancies at all (whew!!!). He is very supportive of surrogacy, and he knows that I love to be pregnant- he just smiled and said "welcome back!". I got to see baby again this morning, too. It's amazing the changes that can take place over the course of five days. Little Sethbryo had a perfect heartbeat, and was rolling around and happy in there. :)
I am still having some pretty awesome nausea- but not as often as I was before. I have left the all day nausea behind (for the most part), and have returned to feeling sick mostly in the evenings. My pregnancy BFF is showing herself already though...... hunka hunka burning... heart??? I keep hoping that I'll have at least one pregnancy where my chest doesn't feel like it's on fire from mid first trimester on. It seems that this will not be that pregnancy either. Ah, sweet sweet Zantac, how I love you.
On another note, my 16 week pregnant friend is jealous of my 8 week pregnant baby belly. No, for real. I keep telling her, you have to remember- this is #5!!! My body registers those pregnancy hormones, and that little beating heart and screams "WOOHOO!!!! Let's let it ALL hang out!!!". The "belly" in my pic is all leftover from previous pregnancies for sure, but I can't suck it in anymore.... ;)
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
When my stomach rules my world...
We've talked about the whole pregnancy nausea thing. The experience has been different for me this time.... I wake up with nausea, I watch TV with nausea, I go to work with nausea; it goes on errands with me, and helps the kids with their homework. I've even learned to eat through the nausea- if I didn't, I would never eat. Another funny thing happens during pregnancy- those weird food cravings and aversions. Now, you would think that the nausea would influence the cravings- but I've learned that may not always be the case. I have a friend who is just a little more pregnant than me, and she doesn't have any nausea at all. She does, however, have cravings.
It's always interesting when these food oddities hit. You're going out to dinner with friends and someone says "where do you want to eat?". Usually I'm all, "wherever, I'm not picky about restaurants". Now, I must ask my stomach.
Me: Texas Roadhouse?
My stomach: Around all that meat??? Gross. No.
Me: Baja Fresh?
My stomach: Hmmmm.... We usually love Mexican food. But no.
Me: Olive Garden?
Stomach: No.
Me (getting annoyed): Why not? We LOVE the Olive Garden!!!
My stomach: I don't know. Just no.
Me: Chili's?
My stomach: Oohhhhhh... We can get mashed potatoes there. That would be okay.
I have similar conversations with my stomach now for almost every meal or snack. There is a very short list of things that are always okay, but it's nice to have a few things to fall back on.
Then there is the phenomena of I MUST HAVE AND EAT THAT IMMEDIATELY. It can strike at any time, or in any place. Friday night, my stomach (uterus????) decided that we must have orange juice IMMEDIATELY. I was tasked to the cafeteria to buy some as soon as possible. Here's the thing about cafeteria orange juice- it's Ocean Spray. While it is pulp free, it has the distinction of being the most awful OJ out there. I drank it anyway. And kind of liked it. Lucky for me, my fantastic hubby headed to the store and bought me 2 gallons of Minute Maid the next day. With a little help from the kids, we made it through the 2 gallons in about three days. And cold OJ? Still my beverage of choice. We'll see how long that lasts....
It's always an adventure to see what cravings and aversions each pregnancy brings. One constant remains throughout them all, though.... Chicken makes me want to barf.
It's always interesting when these food oddities hit. You're going out to dinner with friends and someone says "where do you want to eat?". Usually I'm all, "wherever, I'm not picky about restaurants". Now, I must ask my stomach.
Me: Texas Roadhouse?
My stomach: Around all that meat??? Gross. No.
Me: Baja Fresh?
My stomach: Hmmmm.... We usually love Mexican food. But no.
Me: Olive Garden?
Stomach: No.
Me (getting annoyed): Why not? We LOVE the Olive Garden!!!
My stomach: I don't know. Just no.
Me: Chili's?
My stomach: Oohhhhhh... We can get mashed potatoes there. That would be okay.
I have similar conversations with my stomach now for almost every meal or snack. There is a very short list of things that are always okay, but it's nice to have a few things to fall back on.
Then there is the phenomena of I MUST HAVE AND EAT THAT IMMEDIATELY. It can strike at any time, or in any place. Friday night, my stomach (uterus????) decided that we must have orange juice IMMEDIATELY. I was tasked to the cafeteria to buy some as soon as possible. Here's the thing about cafeteria orange juice- it's Ocean Spray. While it is pulp free, it has the distinction of being the most awful OJ out there. I drank it anyway. And kind of liked it. Lucky for me, my fantastic hubby headed to the store and bought me 2 gallons of Minute Maid the next day. With a little help from the kids, we made it through the 2 gallons in about three days. And cold OJ? Still my beverage of choice. We'll see how long that lasts....
It's always an adventure to see what cravings and aversions each pregnancy brings. One constant remains throughout them all, though.... Chicken makes me want to barf.
Sunday, April 21, 2013
There's a party in my uterus
Who knew embryos knew how to party???
I had a pretty good idea that things were progressing well in my uterus. The all-day nausea and aversion to Diet Coke being classic signs and all. Still, we were all waiting for that first ultrasound.... There's something about seeing that heartbeat that just makes me feel so much better. And then we were finally going to answer that nagging little question- one baby or two??? (Although the chance of twins was less likely since we only transferred one embryo, the chance was still there...)
When we went in for the first ultrasound last December, I remember I was really nervous. We had been planning to try and Face Time with Seth and Johnny, and all I could think was "but what if something's wrong? What if we don't see a heartbeat? Maybe we shouldn't Face Time this.....". I was a tiny bit relieved when there was no wifi to connect to in the office. And then the ultrasound was not what we were hoping for.
Friday, headed to the clinic, I wasn't nervous at all. I was hoping that we would get good pictures of the embryo, and that we would be able to see a great heartbeat. Because I've been more nauseated than usual, I was wondering if there really might be two babies in there. But it was all happy anticipation. There was no trepidation at all as I got up onto that table, or when the tech got that probe all ready to go.
When the picture resolved itself on the screen, it was exactly what we were hoping to see- a lake of black fluid, a yolk sac, and a grain of rice with a flutter in it's midsection. Whew! I asked the tech to really look around in there, but our little Sethbryo hadn't split. Just one healthy, heart happily beating baby-to-be in there.
The tech got an unusual shot.... It looks like little Sethbryo is standing up in my uterus holding onto a balloon (the yolk sac). Little bean is having a party to celebrate!
I had a pretty good idea that things were progressing well in my uterus. The all-day nausea and aversion to Diet Coke being classic signs and all. Still, we were all waiting for that first ultrasound.... There's something about seeing that heartbeat that just makes me feel so much better. And then we were finally going to answer that nagging little question- one baby or two??? (Although the chance of twins was less likely since we only transferred one embryo, the chance was still there...)
When we went in for the first ultrasound last December, I remember I was really nervous. We had been planning to try and Face Time with Seth and Johnny, and all I could think was "but what if something's wrong? What if we don't see a heartbeat? Maybe we shouldn't Face Time this.....". I was a tiny bit relieved when there was no wifi to connect to in the office. And then the ultrasound was not what we were hoping for.
Friday, headed to the clinic, I wasn't nervous at all. I was hoping that we would get good pictures of the embryo, and that we would be able to see a great heartbeat. Because I've been more nauseated than usual, I was wondering if there really might be two babies in there. But it was all happy anticipation. There was no trepidation at all as I got up onto that table, or when the tech got that probe all ready to go.
When the picture resolved itself on the screen, it was exactly what we were hoping to see- a lake of black fluid, a yolk sac, and a grain of rice with a flutter in it's midsection. Whew! I asked the tech to really look around in there, but our little Sethbryo hadn't split. Just one healthy, heart happily beating baby-to-be in there.
The tech got an unusual shot.... It looks like little Sethbryo is standing up in my uterus holding onto a balloon (the yolk sac). Little bean is having a party to celebrate!
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Looking good
I had our 20 day beta draw on Monday morning. The number came back at 5,036! :)
Looks like our little Sethbryo is hanging in there and growing right on track. I'm starting to get anxious for our first ultrasound. There is something about seeing that little beating heart that eases my mind and my nerves.
I was looking back on really old posts the other day. I realized that with my first surro experience, I talked a lot more about what I was feeling. This time, I almost feel like I'm just relating the experiences as they come along. Not better or worse, just different. But I thought maybe I'd share some feelings this post....
When we got that first round of betas back, all the way back in November, I knew that something wasn't right. Not that something was wrong, but just that it wasn't right. I didn't know where the pregnancy was going or what the outcome would be but it just didn't feel like any of the other pregnancies I had had. I tried to stay upbeat and positive, but a lot of days it was hard. I never wanted to show my doubts to Seth and Johnny because I didn't want them to worry. We were all focusing on a positive outcome and hoping with all our might. But in the end, I wasn't very surprised when the pregnancy didn't make it. They say that many, many women can tell when something is not right with their pregnancies- even before anything happens or is confirmed. I never really made any plans for the spring or summer based on where I would be in my pregnancy, never got out the early embryonic pictures to look at with the kids, or hunted down an app for my phone that talked about fetal development and "what's happening this week". I didn't even know exactly what our due date was going to be until a couple weeks after our transfer. It wasn't that I didn't want to do these things- it was just that doing those things didn't feel right. I kept telling myself it was "too soon".
Fast forward to now. Even though we have proof positive that our betas are in a healthier place, I've just felt better about this pregnancy from the beginning. My body is telling me that things are going on in there. My heart is quiet and happy. We're 5 weeks in, and I've hunted down that fetal development app, and looked to see how pregnant I will be on birthdays, and during the time I took off this summer. I haven't looked at the embryo pictures with the kids, but they haven't asked about them either... ;) I feel like telling more people that I'm pregnant again (even though I won't. I still have a strong desire to keep it quiet at work). I'm already thinking about what I'm going to wear later this summer and appreciating that I'm not going to have to dress in layers while pregnant until close to the very end!
There are ups and downs in every pregnancy, and no pregnancy is "picture perfect". I just feel in my heart that we are on the right track this time, and that we are going to make it through those scary first weeks (and that scary first trimester) this time. My fingers are crossed as I say this though, because I never, never want to tempt fate!!!
Looks like our little Sethbryo is hanging in there and growing right on track. I'm starting to get anxious for our first ultrasound. There is something about seeing that little beating heart that eases my mind and my nerves.
I was looking back on really old posts the other day. I realized that with my first surro experience, I talked a lot more about what I was feeling. This time, I almost feel like I'm just relating the experiences as they come along. Not better or worse, just different. But I thought maybe I'd share some feelings this post....
When we got that first round of betas back, all the way back in November, I knew that something wasn't right. Not that something was wrong, but just that it wasn't right. I didn't know where the pregnancy was going or what the outcome would be but it just didn't feel like any of the other pregnancies I had had. I tried to stay upbeat and positive, but a lot of days it was hard. I never wanted to show my doubts to Seth and Johnny because I didn't want them to worry. We were all focusing on a positive outcome and hoping with all our might. But in the end, I wasn't very surprised when the pregnancy didn't make it. They say that many, many women can tell when something is not right with their pregnancies- even before anything happens or is confirmed. I never really made any plans for the spring or summer based on where I would be in my pregnancy, never got out the early embryonic pictures to look at with the kids, or hunted down an app for my phone that talked about fetal development and "what's happening this week". I didn't even know exactly what our due date was going to be until a couple weeks after our transfer. It wasn't that I didn't want to do these things- it was just that doing those things didn't feel right. I kept telling myself it was "too soon".
Fast forward to now. Even though we have proof positive that our betas are in a healthier place, I've just felt better about this pregnancy from the beginning. My body is telling me that things are going on in there. My heart is quiet and happy. We're 5 weeks in, and I've hunted down that fetal development app, and looked to see how pregnant I will be on birthdays, and during the time I took off this summer. I haven't looked at the embryo pictures with the kids, but they haven't asked about them either... ;) I feel like telling more people that I'm pregnant again (even though I won't. I still have a strong desire to keep it quiet at work). I'm already thinking about what I'm going to wear later this summer and appreciating that I'm not going to have to dress in layers while pregnant until close to the very end!
There are ups and downs in every pregnancy, and no pregnancy is "picture perfect". I just feel in my heart that we are on the right track this time, and that we are going to make it through those scary first weeks (and that scary first trimester) this time. My fingers are crossed as I say this though, because I never, never want to tempt fate!!!
Friday, April 5, 2013
Holy nausea, Batman!
I have a love/ hate relationship with "morning sickness".
First of all, whoever dubbed it "morning" sickness was wrong. I feel fine in the morning. I feel fine in the early afternoon. I get hit with nausea and the inability to look at food starting between 330 and 430 in the afternoon, and it lasts until I go to bed. It's been this way through every one of my pregnancies.... Perhaps we should just call it "pregnancy sickness".
How could anyone love any part of that jazz you ask? Well, the nausea lets me know that everything is on the right track in there. In the very beginning, when the baby in question is the size of a poppyseed or a gummy bear or whatever other food analogy you want to give it, you have no way of knowing if it is okay in there. I can't feel the baby move, my belly just looks chubby- not beautifully pregnantly round... there are no other cues that there is anything different going on in there. So, while feeling green isn't my favorite way to spend half of the day, I actually kinda like it. If I've got enough nausea to make me uncomfortable, then something must be right in there.
Let's talk about the timing of said pregnancy sickness. I usually come down with this loveliness anywhere between 6 and 8 weeks' along. Thank heavens I'm not a puker, I imagine that would be miserable, but nausea is debilitating in it's own way. This last week, I haven't had what I consider full blown pregnancy nausea, but my stomach has been increasingly unsettled as the days go on. How far along are you again??? you ask. 5 weeks tomorrow. That's right; unsettled stomach and nausea starting in week 4. For me, this is new territory. I have a friend who is having a grand time teasing me that our one little Sethbryo split in there and that I'm now carrying TWO little Sethbryos.... HA! Only the ultrasound will tell.....
But I'll tell you what. After our experience last pregnancy, I'm embracing every moment of yuckiness that I feel. The fact that I feel like this this soon can only mean that things are growing and developing right along in there. That's what my fingers are crossed for anyway. If this little embryo wants to let me know that all is well by making me feel like I've just been on the Tilt a Whirl at the fair, then bring it on.
First of all, whoever dubbed it "morning" sickness was wrong. I feel fine in the morning. I feel fine in the early afternoon. I get hit with nausea and the inability to look at food starting between 330 and 430 in the afternoon, and it lasts until I go to bed. It's been this way through every one of my pregnancies.... Perhaps we should just call it "pregnancy sickness".
How could anyone love any part of that jazz you ask? Well, the nausea lets me know that everything is on the right track in there. In the very beginning, when the baby in question is the size of a poppyseed or a gummy bear or whatever other food analogy you want to give it, you have no way of knowing if it is okay in there. I can't feel the baby move, my belly just looks chubby- not beautifully pregnantly round... there are no other cues that there is anything different going on in there. So, while feeling green isn't my favorite way to spend half of the day, I actually kinda like it. If I've got enough nausea to make me uncomfortable, then something must be right in there.
Let's talk about the timing of said pregnancy sickness. I usually come down with this loveliness anywhere between 6 and 8 weeks' along. Thank heavens I'm not a puker, I imagine that would be miserable, but nausea is debilitating in it's own way. This last week, I haven't had what I consider full blown pregnancy nausea, but my stomach has been increasingly unsettled as the days go on. How far along are you again??? you ask. 5 weeks tomorrow. That's right; unsettled stomach and nausea starting in week 4. For me, this is new territory. I have a friend who is having a grand time teasing me that our one little Sethbryo split in there and that I'm now carrying TWO little Sethbryos.... HA! Only the ultrasound will tell.....
But I'll tell you what. After our experience last pregnancy, I'm embracing every moment of yuckiness that I feel. The fact that I feel like this this soon can only mean that things are growing and developing right along in there. That's what my fingers are crossed for anyway. If this little embryo wants to let me know that all is well by making me feel like I've just been on the Tilt a Whirl at the fair, then bring it on.
Thursday, April 4, 2013
One year later
It never ceases to amaze me how quickly time passes. My mom always told me it would go faster and faster the older I got, but I never really believed her. Until I had kids of my own. Somehow, having children makes time speed up until it's passing in a mind boggling blur. I seems like just last year that Chris and I were welcoming our first baby into our lives- he will be 10 in May. And Mia, our beloved surro-baby that we welcomed just last week? Well, she was one year old yesterday!
On our special girl's first birthday, I took some time to think about the last year. Surrogacy is such a life changing experience. A year ago today, Chris and I were getting ready to introduce this little miracle girl to her dad and her grandparents. We were sad that it was time for us to let her go, but also so excited to see her with the family that had been anxiously awaiting her arrival. There was an overwhelming sense of joy and accomplishment that we were a part of creating a family.
In the first couple weeks after Jason and Mia went home, I struggled a little bit with a sense of loss. After taking home three children of my own, it felt a little like something was missing. I was pregnant, I delivered, but there was no baby in my home to take care of. I was afraid to say these things out loud or to anyone else though. I was afraid someone on the outside would mistake the feelings I was having for feelings of wanting to have kept Mia. But as I struggled with that sense of loss, never once did I regret our journey, or begrudge that Mia was with her dad. That was the entire point of our surrogacy experience. I just had to convince that biological imperative to mother that lives deep inside me that we were okay without a newborn in the house.
I have a few friends who had babies the same time I had Mia. As the year went on, I would watch them with their babies. Through the milestones that they passed, their easy times and their hard times, I just smiled. I would think of Mia with Jason- that she was probably doing some of the same things at the same time- and I was happy that they were experiencing those milestones together. I was relieved that I wasn't the one living through those infant moments again!
When Mia was a newborn, looking at her pictures was a little bittersweet for me- my brain knew she belonged with Jason, but my body missed holding her. Now, I see her pictures and I see a beautiful, happy little girl who is so loved, and it is just sweet- the sadness is gone. The thought that I carried her and gave birth to her is never my first thought anymore. It is heartwarming to see Jason and Mia growing together, and I just melt when I see how much she loves her daddy.
Chris and I remain thankful and grateful for our relationship with Jason. We don't get the chance to talk as much as we used to, but we still make an effort to keep in touch. We get pictures of Mia regularly, some video, and we even manage to Face Time every now and then. They are our family.
On our special girl's first birthday, I took some time to think about the last year. Surrogacy is such a life changing experience. A year ago today, Chris and I were getting ready to introduce this little miracle girl to her dad and her grandparents. We were sad that it was time for us to let her go, but also so excited to see her with the family that had been anxiously awaiting her arrival. There was an overwhelming sense of joy and accomplishment that we were a part of creating a family.
In the first couple weeks after Jason and Mia went home, I struggled a little bit with a sense of loss. After taking home three children of my own, it felt a little like something was missing. I was pregnant, I delivered, but there was no baby in my home to take care of. I was afraid to say these things out loud or to anyone else though. I was afraid someone on the outside would mistake the feelings I was having for feelings of wanting to have kept Mia. But as I struggled with that sense of loss, never once did I regret our journey, or begrudge that Mia was with her dad. That was the entire point of our surrogacy experience. I just had to convince that biological imperative to mother that lives deep inside me that we were okay without a newborn in the house.
I have a few friends who had babies the same time I had Mia. As the year went on, I would watch them with their babies. Through the milestones that they passed, their easy times and their hard times, I just smiled. I would think of Mia with Jason- that she was probably doing some of the same things at the same time- and I was happy that they were experiencing those milestones together. I was relieved that I wasn't the one living through those infant moments again!
When Mia was a newborn, looking at her pictures was a little bittersweet for me- my brain knew she belonged with Jason, but my body missed holding her. Now, I see her pictures and I see a beautiful, happy little girl who is so loved, and it is just sweet- the sadness is gone. The thought that I carried her and gave birth to her is never my first thought anymore. It is heartwarming to see Jason and Mia growing together, and I just melt when I see how much she loves her daddy.
Chris and I remain thankful and grateful for our relationship with Jason. We don't get the chance to talk as much as we used to, but we still make an effort to keep in touch. We get pictures of Mia regularly, some video, and we even manage to Face Time every now and then. They are our family.
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Our betas are in!!!
Whew! I'm so relieved that wait is over! It went by pretty fast, and wasn't as excruciating as last time- but I'm still glad it's over. Friday afternoon, I got a call from Natalie, our coordinator. She was very excited- our betas look great!
Day 7 beta: 60.5
Day 9 beta: 170
Woohoo!!!! So our number did it's job and more than doubled. If you don't remember, with our last pregnancy the numbers were:
Day 6: 2.2
Day 8: 15
Day 11: 112
Our numbers are in a much better place this time. Next is our 20 day draw, then the heartbeat confirmation ultrasound after that. I'm so relieved and so happy.... I was having a lot of anxiety about everything going the right way this time. And so far, it seems to be. So, fingers crossed for normal, healthy, happy pregnancy progression from here.
I love seeing those lines get darker!!!
Day 7 beta: 60.5
Day 9 beta: 170
Woohoo!!!! So our number did it's job and more than doubled. If you don't remember, with our last pregnancy the numbers were:
Day 6: 2.2
Day 8: 15
Day 11: 112
Our numbers are in a much better place this time. Next is our 20 day draw, then the heartbeat confirmation ultrasound after that. I'm so relieved and so happy.... I was having a lot of anxiety about everything going the right way this time. And so far, it seems to be. So, fingers crossed for normal, healthy, happy pregnancy progression from here.
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Waiting and waiting some more...
And now we wait.
The ease of waiting for those magical beta numbers directly coincides with my schedule, I've discovered. When we flew to New Jersey for our transfer with Mia, we transferred, had our bed rest days, flew home, I worked three nights, then it was time for blood draws. The week wait really didn't seem too awful at all and I was surprised at how fast the time went. When we had our transfer last November, I took my three work nights off for the transfer and my rest days. Then I had 4 days ahead of me before working again. I wasn't running and busy (even though it was Thanksgiving week), and the week long wait seemed to take for.ev.er..... I thought the blood draw days would never come!!!
This time around was a lot like the transfer with Mia. We had the transfer, I had my rest days, then it was immediately time for me to head back to work. 2 busy days at home later and it was time for my first blood draw. Again I wondered, where did that week go??? Waiting the two days from Wednesday to Friday, though hasn't even been bad. My schedule is working in my favor! I'm working Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday nights this week (which almost never happens) because of the Easter holiday. So, I'll head to work tonight. And at the end of my shift, it will be time for that second draw. Then I'll go home and sleep, and when I wake up I should know what our betas are! It'll go pretty fast!
Of course it's nerve wracking waiting for that set of numbers. I'll let you in on a tiny secret though- we already know our first number. And as I've explained many times, that first number doesn't really matter much. It's just a reference point for knowing if the second number "has doubled or more". I'm dying to know what our second number is, but it will be less than 24 hours now!!!
Here's hoping for big numbers this time around!!! I feel like we all deserve a less stressful and unsure experience.
The ease of waiting for those magical beta numbers directly coincides with my schedule, I've discovered. When we flew to New Jersey for our transfer with Mia, we transferred, had our bed rest days, flew home, I worked three nights, then it was time for blood draws. The week wait really didn't seem too awful at all and I was surprised at how fast the time went. When we had our transfer last November, I took my three work nights off for the transfer and my rest days. Then I had 4 days ahead of me before working again. I wasn't running and busy (even though it was Thanksgiving week), and the week long wait seemed to take for.ev.er..... I thought the blood draw days would never come!!!
This time around was a lot like the transfer with Mia. We had the transfer, I had my rest days, then it was immediately time for me to head back to work. 2 busy days at home later and it was time for my first blood draw. Again I wondered, where did that week go??? Waiting the two days from Wednesday to Friday, though hasn't even been bad. My schedule is working in my favor! I'm working Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday nights this week (which almost never happens) because of the Easter holiday. So, I'll head to work tonight. And at the end of my shift, it will be time for that second draw. Then I'll go home and sleep, and when I wake up I should know what our betas are! It'll go pretty fast!
Of course it's nerve wracking waiting for that set of numbers. I'll let you in on a tiny secret though- we already know our first number. And as I've explained many times, that first number doesn't really matter much. It's just a reference point for knowing if the second number "has doubled or more". I'm dying to know what our second number is, but it will be less than 24 hours now!!!
Here's hoping for big numbers this time around!!! I feel like we all deserve a less stressful and unsure experience.
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Hoping the stars are aligned...
Sorry for the 20 days of silence. I didn't blog because I felt like I would be repeating things I've said before. Meds and ultrasounds and blood draws (oh my!).
Yesterday was that long awaited- I never thought it would get here again day- Transfer Day.... I spent the week indulging in my superstitious routines. Massage with Linda: check. Pedicure with green polish: check. Lucky green transfer shirt: check. And new to the routine this time, hopefully lucky green nail polish.
As you all know, I was anxious about the thawing process. We didn't have multiple embryos to work with, and I was afraid the thaw would damage the little embies that we did have. Our doc assured me that the freezing and thawing techniques have been refined over the last 5-7 years ensuring an 85-90% embryo survival rate. Seth and Johnny had discussed the possibility of transferring two embryos this go round to maximize the chances of a successful pregnancy, but ultimately decided against it.
When I arrived at the clinic yesterday morning, the nurse gave me my magic little blue (green???) pill. About 10 minutes later, my head was starting to feel swimmy, and they took us back to the transfer room. The valium made me much sleepier this time, and I fell asleep on the table before the doc came in to do the procedure. I woke up enough to hear her say that the embryo had thawed beautifully, and that it was already trying to grow. She quoted us a 40% chance pregnancy with this transfer. Which is double the chance of a "natural" conception every month, if you think about it.
Next thing I knew, we were looking at the screen, and she was placing the new little embie between those two air bubbles. Then I was laid back, propped up into the clinic's special post transfer position (they are a little superstitious too), and left to my own for 20 minutes. I slept through most of those minutes.....
Now I'm home again, on my days of "rest". I'm catching up on movies I haven't watched in awhile, and checking out some shows on Netflix that I've heard good things about. We're into the 7-10 day wait that seems to go on forever before we know if the transfer was successful or not.
Here's hoping the stars are aligned and this little embryo grows.
Yesterday was that long awaited- I never thought it would get here again day- Transfer Day.... I spent the week indulging in my superstitious routines. Massage with Linda: check. Pedicure with green polish: check. Lucky green transfer shirt: check. And new to the routine this time, hopefully lucky green nail polish.
As you all know, I was anxious about the thawing process. We didn't have multiple embryos to work with, and I was afraid the thaw would damage the little embies that we did have. Our doc assured me that the freezing and thawing techniques have been refined over the last 5-7 years ensuring an 85-90% embryo survival rate. Seth and Johnny had discussed the possibility of transferring two embryos this go round to maximize the chances of a successful pregnancy, but ultimately decided against it.
When I arrived at the clinic yesterday morning, the nurse gave me my magic little blue (green???) pill. About 10 minutes later, my head was starting to feel swimmy, and they took us back to the transfer room. The valium made me much sleepier this time, and I fell asleep on the table before the doc came in to do the procedure. I woke up enough to hear her say that the embryo had thawed beautifully, and that it was already trying to grow. She quoted us a 40% chance pregnancy with this transfer. Which is double the chance of a "natural" conception every month, if you think about it.
Next thing I knew, we were looking at the screen, and she was placing the new little embie between those two air bubbles. Then I was laid back, propped up into the clinic's special post transfer position (they are a little superstitious too), and left to my own for 20 minutes. I slept through most of those minutes.....
Now I'm home again, on my days of "rest". I'm catching up on movies I haven't watched in awhile, and checking out some shows on Netflix that I've heard good things about. We're into the 7-10 day wait that seems to go on forever before we know if the transfer was successful or not.
Here's hoping the stars are aligned and this little embryo grows.
Friday, March 1, 2013
And here we go!
My lining check ultrasound yesterday went well. It's about time the tech looked at the screen, then looked at me and said "everything looks perfect!" again. I've learned that those are some of the best words ever....
I never thought I would be excited to start twice weekly shots, but there it is. The estradiol shots aren't bad- they almost never hurt, and my hubs is getting to be a pro at giving them to me. I also started the baby aspirin again tonight, along with the prenatal I've been taking. The other pill there is the magnesium supplement I take anyway, but I'll stop that one when I start my right-before-transfer meds.
Things are right on track for the transfer on the 20th. As I knew it would, the time has flown by. Less than three weeks until T-Day, and I know that time will go by fast, too. This journey has had some challenges, and has had its stressful moments. But I feel like that just makes us stronger, and makes us want a healthy pregnancy all the more.
On another note, our surro-baby Mia is almost 1!!!! Her dad posted the most adorable picture of her online today, and it warms my heart to see how much she has grown. I'm still amazed that she's here! Now, to find that perfect birthday gift.......
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
In the meantime....
We're in that lull before all the activity starts again.
I'm on birth control until the 23rd of this month, then it will be time to start estradiol, ultrasounds, and blood draws. I found out last week that our transfer is going to coincide with the transfer of one of my favorite people! We're hoping with all our fingers crossed that both our transfers are successful, and that we will be pregnant together.
Since I don't have anything else super interesting today, I'm going to leave you with a link to something that made me laugh from one of my new favorite funny sites, Pregnant Chicken:
http://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/?tag=asshattery
Read the comments under the pictures...
Enjoy!
I'm on birth control until the 23rd of this month, then it will be time to start estradiol, ultrasounds, and blood draws. I found out last week that our transfer is going to coincide with the transfer of one of my favorite people! We're hoping with all our fingers crossed that both our transfers are successful, and that we will be pregnant together.
Since I don't have anything else super interesting today, I'm going to leave you with a link to something that made me laugh from one of my new favorite funny sites, Pregnant Chicken:
http://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/?tag=asshattery
Read the comments under the pictures...
Enjoy!
Friday, February 8, 2013
This is it...
... The Plan
I had my follow up water ultrasound yesterday, and everything looked much better. I also got to have a little impromptu consult with Natalie. Of course, my big question was "When can I start meds???"
My thinking going into the appointment was that maybe, if my ultrasound was good, I could still start my estradiol valerate on the coming Tuesday- like was originally planned- and we could still make our March 5th transfer. Natalie said that plan was a no- go. I have to start the estradiol within 5 days of the start of my period. Since I started on Saturday, if we were going to transfer this cycle, I HAD to start estradiol valerate that night (last night). That would push our original plan up a few days, and I'd transfer March 1st. The alternative was to go back on the pill again, have another period (my 3rd in 6 weeks and 4th in 8 if you count the miscarriage), and then start meds for a transfer closer to the 22nd of March.
Here is my ultrasound from yesterday.... I remembered to ask the doc to print me my own picture, so I didn't have to scour the internet looking for something close.
There is a little tissue left on the bottom edge, towards the left, but otherwise clear. Much, MUCH better than what we got last week. They were able to go back and print my image from last week. Here it is:
See all the lumps and bumps in there? The difference is pretty incredible.
So I started on the pill last night. I don't have my official med calendar from Natalie yet, so I don't know if I'll be on for two weeks or for three. I think just two. Then I will start my transfer meds. We're on the books for a March 20th transfer. Here's hoping that all goes (at least kinda) as planned.
I'm giving my uterus more little pep talks.... :)
I had my follow up water ultrasound yesterday, and everything looked much better. I also got to have a little impromptu consult with Natalie. Of course, my big question was "When can I start meds???"
My thinking going into the appointment was that maybe, if my ultrasound was good, I could still start my estradiol valerate on the coming Tuesday- like was originally planned- and we could still make our March 5th transfer. Natalie said that plan was a no- go. I have to start the estradiol within 5 days of the start of my period. Since I started on Saturday, if we were going to transfer this cycle, I HAD to start estradiol valerate that night (last night). That would push our original plan up a few days, and I'd transfer March 1st. The alternative was to go back on the pill again, have another period (my 3rd in 6 weeks and 4th in 8 if you count the miscarriage), and then start meds for a transfer closer to the 22nd of March.
Here is my ultrasound from yesterday.... I remembered to ask the doc to print me my own picture, so I didn't have to scour the internet looking for something close.
There is a little tissue left on the bottom edge, towards the left, but otherwise clear. Much, MUCH better than what we got last week. They were able to go back and print my image from last week. Here it is:
See all the lumps and bumps in there? The difference is pretty incredible.
So I started on the pill last night. I don't have my official med calendar from Natalie yet, so I don't know if I'll be on for two weeks or for three. I think just two. Then I will start my transfer meds. We're on the books for a March 20th transfer. Here's hoping that all goes (at least kinda) as planned.
I'm giving my uterus more little pep talks.... :)
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