Well, our 20 day beta draw was this afternoon.... I'm only 19 days post transfer, but I guess that counts too. The clinic was hoping to see a number around 1000.
It's been quite the week waiting for this beta draw. I think we have all been a little hesitant to celebrate... Though we have a couple positives under our belt, they're not POSITIVE. We've been waiting for that 4th number to see if the numbers are still going up.
I've been feeling more pregnant the last week. Sore in all the places that should be sore, appropriately tired, starting to get nauseous in the evenings, and increasingly itchy.... But maybe it's all in my head? I manage to stay positive during the day, knowing that things are all right in there. But at night I dream of betas in the 200s, and bleeding... The things that I don't let myself contemplate during waking hours.
The first few weeks that I'm pregnant are arguably the worst for me. The physical discomfort isn't there, it's all the worrying and hoping that everything is okay. The baby is the size of a poppyseed... I can't see it or feel it to know that it is okay. Those embryos just seem so fragile.... It's even too early to see anything on ultrasound. And as a surrogate, it's not just my family that is impacted; Seth and Johnny are counting on us too.
I have a pretty reliable uterus. This little "oven" has done its job 4 times already without fail. There's no reason for me to doubt its magical baby growing power now. We have the power of positive thinking on our side!
Our beta today was 1,676.
Yes, we're all doing a happy dance.
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