Wishing, and hoping, and dreaming, and waiting....

Waiting is the worst, and I am awful at it.

After the embryo transfer, you're instructed to go home and "rest".  Full bedrest for the rest of the first day, then two "princess days" after.  Those pretty much mean stay in bed or on the couch, have people bring you food, and catch up on your DVR (and maybe even a little sleep!).  After your three days, it's back to life as normal.  But the entire time, eating at the back of your brain, is one question... Am I pregnant now???

The clinic here does blood tests- the Beta hcG draws, at 6 and 8 days post transfer.  For me that is the Wednesday before and the Friday after Thanksgiving.  They will have the results, but won't call us until Friday.  With Betas, the second number is the important one.  They will compare it to the first number taken (if it is not a negative from the first), looking to see if it has at least doubled in the two day period.  If it has, then you are considered pregnant.

Now, I'm part of the ranks of IVF gals who just can't wait for that silly 2nd blood draw.  You can bet that I'll be taking a home test at some point.  With my last surrogacy, I was able to wait until a week after transfer to test.  I had my bedrest, then we flew home, then I worked my three nights- so waiting wasn't that hard.  This time, I had the transfer and my three days, then two days off before going back to work.  And the waiting is killing me!!!  I work tonight and the next two, so that will help. 

I'm wondering when it will be best to take those pesky home tests though....  Last time, I got a very faint positive on 7 days post transfer.  But my first blood draw is 6 days post transfer this time- do I do it on the two days of my blood draws, or wait until that 7th day???  Or do I just buy the Costco pack and do a test daily?  lol....

It's very hard not to get my hopes up.  I'm trying so hard to be neutral until we know for sure.  I know a negative result will be...  well.  We all know how a negative result will feel.  Since Thursday, I've dreamed both that I am pregnant and that I'm not.  I've been pretty crampy, and that is usually a good sign.  Then I tell myself to just be patient and wait until I can test... torturing myself and over analyzing every little twinge won't give me an answer either way. 

But have I ever been known for my patience???